QUIZ: Who Will You Be To Your Sugar Baby?

91�� Fam — Sat, 30 May 2020 09:28:00 +0000

Inspired by the talented Mo’Believe’s latest project, Big Daddy Mo‘, where he imagines himself as a generous sugar daddy, this quiz knows exactly how you’ll treat your future (or current) sugar babies. Will you be a glucose guardian, a sucre papi/mami or a sugarcane daddy/mummy?

Take the quiz here:

What INEC Didn’t Tell You About Getting Your PVC

91�� Fam — Fri, 27 Jul 2018 12:15:22 +0000

The General elections are coming in February 2019, but we know the only way to make our voices count, is to vote.

And the only we way to vote is to get a (PVC).

We know how to get PVCs, but we thought, wouldn’t it be awesome to actually show everyone how our PVC experiences went?

“Hey guys, if you don’t have a PVC, don’t come to the office. Register to get your PVCs, and work remotely.”

That’s Tomiwa, our Captain and Chief Patriot. He already had his, so he just Situation Roomed us from the office. A bunch of people on the team were on the hustle; Bankole, Toketemu, Folarin, Sade, Lanre, Sudeen. So, how did the exercise go?

Time: 8:36am

Sudeen: “I’m at the INEC Office already. Got here before 8am sharp. My number is 96. This is Sudeen, reporting from INEC office in Iyana Ipaja, Lagos.” Sade: Jesus. I guess I’m screwed. Tomiwa Aladekomo: Content people, why is Sudeen, our Finance Manager outshining you in documentation of your experiences? Where’s everyone else? Still in bed? Toketemu: We’re on our way!

What’s your struggle?

��’a��: I registered in Rivers State in 2011 and I’m not sure if I threw away my TVC or lost it. Apparently, I need to go and print my INEC details online first. So I’m somewhere trying to get it printed now. And I’m in Surulere. Toketemu: Folarin and I are lost here. False stop. ��’a��: Lmao. I was there about an hour ago. There’s a designated INEC LGA office. It’s in Small London. (You can check the INEC office address in your LGA .)

Time: 11.40am

Toketemu: This is Toke reporting live from Small London. For the record, Folarin and I walked from Masha to Small London. True patriotism right here. Sade: Almost at Small London too. Tomiwa: How’s it going? Toketemu: There are about three lists and our names are on the third list but the officials are almost halfway through the first. The crowd doesn’t seem large, but apparently, there’s about 170 people on the lists. They’re on number 46 now. And they close at 3pm. (INEC announced ) Toketemu: Officers in uniform get preferential treatment. Ayoola: Elderly people too.

Time: 12:10pm.

Sudeen: It’s my turn now. I got my form now, about 4 hours later. Those of us with TVCs have different forms. They’ve been following the process since, not taking bribes. ��’a��: The process is a little broken. There’s a Telemundo element to my situation. I have no TVC, but I have my Voter Identification Number. To get a new TVC, I have to go to the Local Government I registered, but then I want to transfer. And I need a TVC to transfer. So, I’m just going to go back to INEC and cry. Toketemu: Still here, waiting. They are still on the first list. This isn’t looking very likely. Sudeen: Hey ��’a��, don’t worry, it’s easy. Just go to the . As long as you’ve registered before, all you need to find your V.I.N is the state where you registered and your Date of Birth. Tomiwa: I never changed my voting location, meaning that I spend every Election Day in the first place I registered, my parent’s. If there are easier locations to register in, might make sense to just hang with a friend or something on Election Day and use one of those. Lanre: My case seems slightly easy. Lost my PVC so I simply need to do a printout of my previous PVC registration. And then get a police report and affidavit. Bankole: Why is everyone in Lekki trying to register at the same goddamn place? Makes no sense. Lanre: It’s the only location in Eti-Osa Local Government.

Time: 1:43pm

Sudeen: I’m done. I managed to get my wife to come along. Another girl came here, she’ll be 18 next week. They told her to come back only after she’s clocked 18. She also has to come back with her birth certificate. Toketemu: It’s a bust here, told us to come back tomorrow morning the only chance you have is to come first thing in the morning. Then we thought if we got our names on the list today we’ll be attended to first in the morning but apparently, the rule here is new day new list. The process is way slower than I thought.

Time: 2.29pm

��’a��: Come back by the end of the year to get your PVC Bankole: Hustle Toketemu: Oh wow Tomiwa: Nice. Did they give you the TVC as well? ��’a��: I have no need for it. My Voter information is online (without the photo). I printed it and gave them. This slip is all I need to show up with year-end to collect my PVC, according to the INEC official here. I noticed it’s a very “Internet-friendly” process here. People who are transferring and don’t need new TVCs can just go online. But then again, maybe that’s my INEC place. Bankole: THAT IS NOT WHAT HAPPENED AT MY PLACE. They acted like they were doing people a favour. I mean, these people were like “we’ll attend to only 100 people today” ��’a��: Well, maybe that’s the number they might have the range for? I think it’s a general design problem with the process, and the people at the INEC office doing the registering are on the receiving end. I went in the morning and they were polite. I went in the afternoon, and they were cranky. Tomiwa: I’m surprised Internet Cafe businesses haven’t sprung up to help people with this. Guess people don’t want to pay money to vote. Bankole: They shouldn’t. And if you’re having obvious capacity problems, like only one registration point for a bigass LGA like Eti Osa, shouldn’t more be opened? Tomiwa: Sudeen and his family are the winners of today’s sprint. Where’s Pepo and Eniola though?

Eniola:

The most important hacks you need to know: Find the closest INEC office to you and go there early, before 8am preferably. Go with valid documents if need be, Most importantly, for a more detailed walkthrough, visit , and in 5 minutes, it’s totally okay if you call yourself a PVC expert.

If you’ve already registered to get your PVC, tell us, how did your experience go?

All the feels you can relate with if you are a JJC in Lagos

91�� Fam — Mon, 25 Jun 2018 16:10:49 +0000

This was how I was staring out the bus when I arrived; everything was strange and I was trying to absorb all details all at once as my cousin pointed out places to me.

Is this really the Lagos?

When I arrived, I had to fight the urge of starting everything I wrote especially tweets with “in this Lagos”. It was on my lips, I found everything contrasting and different and I was so amazed at how unbothered Lagosians are.

It was like watching one of those American movies shot in LA.

I used to tell myself I can’t live in Lagos. That I won’t cope blah blah blah. Well, I am here working hard on the coping thing.

Proud of myself

After small Lagos breeze blew me I didn’t want to leave again. Now I understand why my Lagos friends say “I can’t live anywhere else”.

I’m never going to leave

This was my face when I found out that “under bridge” and “along” at “Ikeja” is not along anywhere or under any bridge.

How many bus stops can even be in one location?

I hadn’t even spent 24 hours in Lagos before I got duped. I can’t even blame the conductor that stole my change when there was JJC written all over my face.

Never again

The first time I tried to head out alone, I confidently went to take the wrong bus, in a matter of seconds I was headed for Yaba thinking I was going to Shoprite Ikeja.

I’ve never been more confused in my life

Lagos is just different sha. You can’t get a direct bus anywhere. Common VI I had to take 4 different buses with plenty “just cross to that bridge and ask when you get there”.

So much stress.

Then the werey bus conductors and drivers. Jesus! They’ll kill someone one day.

It’s only God that’s protecting me.

Don’t get me started on Lagos traffic and the wahala Lagos imposes on you.

You’ll just be looking like kileleyibayi.

This is how I clutch my purse tightly when I am on the streets.

Let’s avoid stories that touch please.

Every day you set out in Lagos and return safely you thank goodness for not letting your purse get snatched, not allowing the reckless drivers knock you down or throw you off and getting paid from your hustle.

Still can’t help but love Lagos though. This post was made by Ibukun Samuel. You should holler at her now now now now. For the culture!

91���� Fam, Author at 91����!