The reason you鈥檙e not getting the jobs you should be getting is that your CV is too similar to other people鈥檚. Wake up and collect your money!
If you can do any of the things in this list, add them to your CV and see if your dream company won鈥檛 hire you before this week runs out.
Making pap
I believe nobody actually knows how to make pap and we鈥檙e all just winging it and deceiving ourselves. Because tell me why everyone I鈥檝e ever met has the same struggles with making something so supposedly simple. Now, if there鈥檚 someone in this life that actually knows how to make custard, shouldn鈥檛 they add it to their CV?
Dating an Igbo woman
If you successfully date an Igbo woman for more than 24 minutes, please, you deserve salutation and respect. Ehn? No wonder you can鈥檛 spell 鈥渨icked(Igbo women)ness鈥 without 鈥淚gbo women鈥. 鈥淎bility to face tough situations鈥 is a valid skill that should be on your CV.
Living in Lagos
Let me tell you a little secret: There were plenty competitors for the role at 91大神 when I applied. The skill I had that set me apart was the 鈥渁bility to work in a tough environment鈥 which I added to my CV, and when they asked me what it meant on the interview, I said, 鈥淚 live in Lagos鈥. Their eyes lit up and they offered me the job on the spot with a salary of 鈧2.4 million monthly. Be like me.
ALSO READ: Lagos Is Sodom and Gomorrah, and Here鈥檚 Why
Parallel parking
Apart from Vin Diesel and his family, there鈥檚 nobody else that can do this thing. The rest of us are just lying to ourselves. So if you add this one to your CV, the recruiter will know you鈥檙e lying. Don鈥檛 do it.
Lying without getting caught
Is that not the job of a writer? Or a politician? So you can lie very well and you鈥檙e still looking for jobs? You鈥檙e not ready, my friend.
Eating pawpaw
If you can eat pawpaw without stronging your face, you鈥檙e tenacious and can confront anything that comes your way. Put it on your CV today.
Cooking beans with a kerosene stove
Startups would absolutely love you. This means you can stick through bad times and persevere until the company receive one $23.4 million of seed funding. If you鈥檙e patient enough to cook beans with a kerosene stove, apply for work at a tech startup today.
ALSO: 7 Special Skills You Didn鈥檛 Even Know You Had as a Nigerian
