I don鈥檛 know how it came to be, but spraying money is a big part of Nigeria鈥檚 owambe culture.
Unfortunately, this culture hurts your account balance. How can you enjoy parties and still avoid spraying money?
Stay at home
You won鈥檛 have to spray anyone if you鈥檙e not at the party. Whip out your phone and stream the party live鈥 problem solved.
Sit down and just vibe to the music
Even if you decide to go to the party, don鈥檛 stand up to dance. Just move from side to side on your seat.
Find fellow non-sprayers
Find like-minded people who are just there to eat and have fun.
Always carry something in both hands
When your hands are busy, you can鈥檛 spray money.
Wear the aso-ebi
This is the best way to blend in with the crowd. They won鈥檛 notice you鈥檙e not spraying if you鈥檝e already spent money on their 鈧50k lace.
Pretend to be the official photographer
Carry a camera around and take on the role of the official wedding photographer. People will assume you鈥檙e too busy capturing moments to participate in the spraying ritual.
Adopt a 鈥渘o cash鈥 policy
Claim that you鈥檝e gone cashless for the day and proudly show off your empty wallet. Insist that you鈥檙e fully committed to the digital payment evolution and cannot participate in the spraying tradition.
Blend into the background
If you can鈥檛 blend in with the 鈥渉aves鈥 in your aso-ebi, find a cozy spot near a wall, somewhere secluded, or even under the tablecloth. Once the spraying starts, fade into the background and become one with the furniture.
Hire a personal bodyguard
Find big gym bros to shield you from any attempts to make you spray. It might cost you, but whatever the cost, we鈥檙e sure it鈥檒l be lower than senselessly spraying mint cash all day.
