People are always dragging Nigerian men up and down like small generators and honestly, we鈥檙e tired of that rubbish. Every day you go online, 鈥淣igerian men this鈥 and 鈥淣igerian men that鈥. When you really think about it, we are the most elite group of men in the world and today, we have gathered evidence necessary to prove this fact.
1. Nigerian men don鈥檛 hear word, so we won鈥檛 hear other women calling us
We barely listen to you when you speak, so what makes you think we can hear other girls trying to get our attention? Simple maths.
2. We know how to cook Indomie and boiled egg
Where else will you find men that are naturally-born chefs? No, we鈥檙e asking you o. We might not know how to make soups, swallow or even white rice, but you see this Indomie and egg thing? Omo, nobody is seeing our brake light. Once in a while, we add crayfish or fried plantain for visual effects.
3. If you鈥檙e tired, we can marry another wife to help lift your burden
Marriage is a partnership and Nigerian men are very supportive of our women. This is why whenever we begin to notice signs of stress, we make the move to bring another woman into the home. People misunderstand this and think it鈥檚 for us, but really it鈥檚 for our queens. Get you a selfless king today.
4. We are very fertile
There鈥檚 a reason why Nigeria is the most populous black nation and trust us, it鈥檚 not because Buhari is working.
5. We will buy you that creamy pasta you鈥檙e hungry for
While they say food is the way to a man鈥檚 heart, we strongly believe creamy pasta is the way to a Nigerian babe鈥檚 heart. You see that pasta you鈥檙e always craving on the interwebs? We will buy it for you. When you鈥檙e ready, call us.
6. We know how to turn on the generator and change over from NEPA
Yes, we know our ancestors were out here building huts and hunting wild animals, but have they experienced the heartbreak that comes pulling and cutting that generator rope thing? No. We do a lot these days and we don鈥檛 feel appreciated for all our hard domestic work.
7. We are tall online and offline
You know how women look tall online, but in real life they end up short? Can never be a Nigerian man. In fact, we鈥檙e even taller in person. #TallKingsUnite
8. We are men of God
You see that man you鈥檝e been praying for? We are him and he is us. The problem is you people like looking far. Turn to your neighbour today and say, 鈥淣eighbour, will you marry me?鈥
9. We have home training so we won鈥檛 disgrace you
If there鈥檚 one thing you can count on us for, it鈥檚 that we鈥檙e trustworthy. Forget all the bad PR we鈥檝e been getting on social media, those people are lying lazy Nigerian youths. You can even leave us in the midst of all the hot girls in Nigeria and we won鈥檛 do anything.
10. We have plenty money
It doesn鈥檛 matter whether it鈥檚 tech or running $1000 per plate restaurants, Nigerian men will always find a way to hustle and keep you away from poverty. We are very loaded.
11. We fine die
Have you met us? You must be a joker.
12. We know one or two things about genital meet and greet
Every day you people drag Nigerian men, but later we will jam you in traffic travelling across state lines for fornication. Give us our flowers please. We know what we鈥檙e doing in that department.
