Every week,聽91大神 seeks to understand how people move the Naira in and out of their lives. Some stories will be struggle-ish, others will be bougie. All the time, it鈥檒l be revealing.
When you think about money, what is the oldest memory that comes to your mind?
Growing up with a struggling single mother. She couldn’t finish school when she got pregnant and had to drop out.
What was she studying?
Accounting. She was also working part-time at a cosmetics store, where she met my dad. They fell in love, and she got pregnant.
Ah.
He was there for three months after I was born, paying bills, buying baby food. Then he disappeared for a month, so she went looking for him. She got to the house and saw plenty of slippers by his door.
My father was getting married to someone else.
Ah.
Anyway, my mum struggled to raise me by herself. At a point, I lived with my grandma and her sister because she couldn鈥檛 cope.
Did she pay for your schooling?
For secondary school and university, I was on a scholarship. My grand-aunt funded it. My uni school fees, for example, was around 鈧500k per year 鈥 it was a private school.
I imagine you still had to worry about taking care of yourself.
When I called my mum for stuff, she鈥檇 say she doesn鈥檛 have money, so I didn鈥檛 like asking her. She sent 鈧5k every month, but it was never enough. The first job I ever did was an ushering job in university 鈥 I was 19 and in 200 level. I鈥檒l never forget that job.
They told us to bring stilettos. We were on our feet for like nine hours on stilettos. The pay was 鈧5k, and I got stranded after. See, I couldn鈥檛 have survived uni without my friends.
Tell me about that.
First of all, I went to a university where cooking wasn鈥檛 allowed. Some periods, my feeding was covered by my friends and my boyfriend. So many times they’d say, “Let’s go and eat. I’ll pay for the food.” Sometimes, my boyfriend would buy me dinner, but there were days when I鈥檇 go without food.
When was your most difficult financial stretch in school?
400 level, while I was working on my final year project. I started calling family members till it got to the point where they were saying, 鈥淎h ahn, what about your mum?鈥
What about your mum?
She used to work at a filling station. It was my sponsor鈥檚 filling station. My mum had to endure harsh working conditions just because of the scholarship I was on. You get? Her salary was 鈧20k without a pension, healthcare. Like, when my mum retired from that job, her salary was still 鈧20k.
Ah.
She worked there for over 15 years. She retired in 2019. She fell really sick and just never went back to work. Diabetes. She suffered a partial stroke too. She鈥檚 52 now. It鈥檚 funny because her first real health crisis started on my last day at school.
Tell me about it.
I think it was the anxiety or excitement of it. She gets very anxious whenever I鈥檓 travelling, for example, so I never tell her till I reach where I鈥檓 going. Anyway, telling her I was coming home the next day, coupled with my graduation, landed her in the hospital for two months.
How did you pay for that?
My grand-aunt. She paid for it; I just did the caring. I’m very grateful to her for my schooling and for my mom’s hospital bills. This was in 2015. The next year, I went for NYSC.
Where did you work?
I worked at a government ministry in Ogun State. There, I started selling jewellery to sustain myself beyond NYSC鈥檚 鈧19,800.
Before NYSC, I fell in love with a guy because of his fingernails. When I started serving, and he didn鈥檛 want me squatting, he paid for my rent, a 鈧50k per year room.
After NYSC?
I started applying to jobs, but nothing was forthcoming.
What kind of jobs were you looking for?
You know now, after NYSC, you’ll be applying to office jobs. I thought I would work in an office, buy my mum a car.
Aha. How did that go?
Nothing happened. I was just sitting at home, getting fat. I spent almost a year at home. My boyfriend used to send me money as the spirit led. I gathered all the money and started selling noodles. Because most people knew I was a graduate, they used to come to my stand and say, 鈥淚 like your courage鈥, and then they鈥檇 buy.
How many cartons were you selling?
I started with half a carton of noodles, bought sardines, bought two spaghetti, bought takeaway packs. I started with about 鈧20k. Then I started delivering to people, and it was legit cool, till I got a job interview at a bank one month after. I was soo happy, until I went there.
What happened?
The role was a contract role as Direct Sales Agent. I didn’t want to take the job, but they said if you do well, you could become a full-time staff of the bank.
How much was the job?
鈧48k before commission. Basically, you鈥檙e going to look for new people to open bank accounts on your own dime.
Out of frustration one day, I just walked up to a man outside the bank and started pitching to him. I had no clue he was the state鈥檚 zonal head of the bank.
I left the job after a month. If I’d stayed there, I would have expanded a whole lot more.
Why did you leave?
Someone paid for my culinary school. My zonal head asked in the office if anyone knew a caterer for a small event. I told him I could do it. This was in 2017.
I got paid 鈧150k to cater for 30 people.
How much did you make in profit?
Maybe 鈧10k, because I didn鈥檛 have my own equipment and spent a lot on renting. Through that gig, I met a man.
Heh.
You know those Yoruba men that say, don鈥檛 call me chief, call me Ade?
Ohooo.
Yes. He asked me what I wanted, and I told him: culinary school. I just said the first thing that came to my head. I didn鈥檛 even know there were culinary schools in Nigeria, but he told me to go and do some research. I found one, and it cost 鈧500k. When I called him, he said: 鈥淲hen do you want to start?鈥
Energy.
He sent 鈧300k for me to make a deposit. But that was when I started asking myself, what does this man want from me gan gan?
Great timing.
I went to meet my office confidante, and he was like, why are you doing as if you don鈥檛 know what he wants? You better return the money if you can鈥檛 do it. But I couldn鈥檛 return the money.
Because you鈥檇 made a deposit.
Then he invited me over one day. When I got to the house, I just knew this wasn鈥檛 his real house. So I drank a lot of Vodka from his bar and…
And?
And that鈥檚 how I collected my balance that day.
Noted.
The next month, I enrolled in culinary school. It felt like I wasted money because my tutor was Youtubing our classes, and I started to wonder why I didn鈥檛 go to Youtube and use the money to start my own business. Anyway, I got a certificate there.
After culinary school, I was at home again. My friend helped me secure an interview at a coffee shop, as a manager. I got that job because of my culinary certificate. The pay was 鈧80k, and it was on that 鈧80k that I made recipes and grew out the menu.
Culinary school finesse. How long did you work there for?
Eight months. She hired someone else to come and work on my team and started paying her 鈧180k.
Interesting.
I was like, why is there so much difference between our salaries when I鈥檓 doing way more? I found out that the girl went to school abroad. I was mad.
Someone else who had gotten another job at a restaurant asked me to apply there. So I did.
I actually told the owner of the restaurant that I wanted 鈧150k, but I settled for 鈧110k. This was in 2019.
What was it like working there?
Generally great, except for the one man, a chef, who made my job difficult. He kept trying to sabotage me.
I also got tips and bonuses that pushed my money to like 鈧130k monthly.
Nice.
Eventually, I left early in 2020. I feel like I鈥檇 have stayed longer if that other chef didn鈥檛 make my life difficult. I really wanted to give my food business a shot though. When I left, I didn’t have much beyond my main 鈧110k salary.
So, how did it go financially? You had 鈧110k and no stable means of income. How did you wing it?
I had a support system. My boyfriend. It鈥檚 not like I was on an allowance or something, but any time I asked for money, he gave me. Whenever he noticed I needed money, he gave me.
How did the lockdown affect your business?
It was bad at first, then it became good just before the end of March as people were stocking up. Demand increased in June when the lockdown was lifted a little. June was my best month.
Do you know how much you made?
No. I put whatever money I made back. I know there were days where I made enough to pull out 鈧10k in a day.
How was your mum at this time?
I placed her on an allowance. It used to be on impulse before, when she鈥檇 call me and say, 鈥淚 need this or that.鈥 Then I realised that it had gotten to a point where I couldn鈥檛 save anymore because I was giving her all my money. So, I put her on a monthly allowance in August this year.
How much?
I told her that I’ll give her 鈧20k every month, but not at once. Every week, I’d give her 鈧5k as a benchmark.
I鈥檇 also been living with my boyfriend for most of the lockdown, but a few months ago, I rented a place. We鈥檇 been having issues, so it felt like the right thing to do. Everything cost me like 鈧800k.
I鈥檓 happy I took that step.
Me too, but why are you happy?
Because I would have gotten stranded. We had a fight, and he kicked me out. Before, I would have had to beg him.
What do you mean, 鈥渂efore鈥?
He threw my load away six times.
Tell me about the f 鈥 wait, are you okay talking about this?
Funny thing is, I don’t know how to feel anything anymore. I tried to cry but I couldn鈥檛.
I don’t even think about it. I can鈥檛 remember much, but the first time it happened was probably two years ago. I went back to live with my mum.
The second time?
I sat down there, outside his house, because it was late. I also didn鈥檛 have any money on me.
Was this his reaction to every fight?
Not really. First, he鈥檇 insult me, insult my family and always remind me that I come from a broken home. Then he would try to hit me or he would scream at me. You know when someone is screaming, and you are trying to get through to the person, you end up having a shouting match with them. Whenever this happened, he would turn the table on me and say I’m the one always screaming the house down.
For five years, I literally held down the relationship.
That鈥檚 heavy. So, back in the kitchen?
I never left. I’ve even been sending CVs out for chef roles.
I noticed that you can鈥檛 tell how much you鈥檝e made, but what鈥檚 an expense that never leaves?
My mum. I legit have to cater for my mom. She has nobody else. Then my house is not yet done.
You and money have an interesting history, you know.
Yes. It stops a lot of nonsense and disrespect. That is why can鈥檛 work under people. I always feel humiliated if I have to depend on them.
Another thing I’m curious about, what’s an aspect of your financial life that you struggle with?
I never have enough even when I try to save.
What is something you want right now but can’t afford?
Like I said, setting up my mum and then setting up myself, because I’ve always wanted to own a restaurant. If I’m able to set up a restaurant or a buka, I don’t need to set her up. I’ll just be like, momsy, come and stay here.
Do you ever wonder what a different life will look like for you?
Yeah. A different life would be a complete family with siblings. My mum wouldn鈥檛 be as lonely as she is. I feel like I missed out on family bond. You know, that closeness. Sometimes I feel like I have nobody. I think that’s something that made me stay with that guy. He gave me a sense of family.
These days, I feel like I鈥檓 floating.
On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your financial happiness and why?
4. I feel like a steady income will make me more grounded, not worrying about the next day. I feel like I can do better, but why am I not better?
Do you ever feel like this?
Sis.
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