The time every capitalist slave dreads is finally here. The holidays are ending, and your owner, capitalism, is about to take over.
Let鈥檚 take you through all the stages and emotions you鈥檒l experience in the coming days.
At first, you鈥檒l be indifferent
You鈥檝e just been sleeping and eating for a while now, and work is the last thing on your mind鈥 if it鈥檚 even on your mind at all.
Then, reality starts to kick in
Your office is already sending you season鈥檚 greetings and 鈥渃an鈥檛 wait to see you at the office鈥 messages. How many days was the holiday sef?
You start considering your options
You start thinking of excuses to stretch your holiday as much as possible. What if you tell oga that the only filling station in your village burned down and there鈥檚 no fuel for buses to travel back to your city? They should understand.
Before realising you have no choice
Because no matter what excuses you give, capitalism always wins. Unless you don鈥檛 have issues with poverty or sleeping under the bridge.
Cue in anger
Then you start blaming everyone and anyone for your predicament. Who even decided people have to work to survive? Whose ancestor invented work, and why do we have to suffer because of that?
You finally resume
And paste on fake smiles when the office oversabi starts talking about how much they missed everyone at the office. Stop it, Sandra. We know you鈥檙e lying.
And embrace fake humility
Have you forgotten it鈥檚 January? No buying of unnecessary amala at lunch. Better hide somewhere and drink your garri in peace if you want to survive the coming days.
Start counting down to the next holiday
How can the next holiday be all the way in April? Why isn鈥檛 Valentine鈥檚 Day a public holiday? Don鈥檛 we all need time off to celebrate the power of love?
NEXT READ: Why the Federal Government Needs to Give Us More Public Holidays
