We鈥檙e now in the month of Jesus鈥 birth and all the abroad boys and girlies will soon be making their way back to the country with one goal: Making their way back into your heart and pants. Say no to them.
Air their messages
It鈥檚 okay if they say you鈥檙e rude and disrespectful. Their opinions don鈥檛 matter; what鈥檚 important is that January 1st meets your heart intact in your chest.
Work through the break
If you have work to distract you, then you鈥檒l have no time to see the innit boys and girls and fall prey to their schemes.
Clear them
Clear anybody that conveniently forgot you existed in the past 11 months, but have now remembered you in the 12th hour. Tell them you鈥檙e not interested in their fake love, and they can get lost.
Get in a temporary relationship
Yes, we know what they say about temporary solutions, but if the IJGB on your case sees a lover in your life, they might leave you alone and direct their gaze on someone else. It鈥檚 not foolproof because they might have 鈥渟trong head鈥 and take your fake relationship as a challenge, but you won鈥檛 know if you don鈥檛 try.
Bill them
It鈥檚 a win-win. They either run away and forget you exist or they fund your December. However it goes, you come out a winner.
Leave the country
Someone coming into Nigeria can鈥檛 reach you if you鈥檙e spending your holiday in another country now, can they? Pack your bags and make those plans today.
Fake an illness
We don鈥檛 know how you鈥檒l explain that you鈥檝e come down with a serious case of I-don鈥檛-want-to-see-your-face-titis, but figure it out and get that IJGB off your back.
Of course, all these don鈥檛 apply to the IJGBs that refer to your mother as 鈥榤um鈥 and know your house address.
