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Remember that friend who used to disturb you whenever a new tune entered their head, or act out movie scenes for you before their next audition? Now they’ve finally had their big break, and somehow, you’re the one they barely remember.

If you’ve never experienced that kind of friendship switch-up, these Nigerians have. They share what it’s like to lose friends who became famous and suddenly started treating them like strangers.

“He’s now a top producer” — Tunji*, 33

I went to the same primary and secondary school with my friend, who’s now a popular music producer and artist. We were still cool after secondary school, but that was around when he started getting serious about music. We both left for university and lost contact for about a year. Before I knew it, he’d started producing for popular artists. I reached out to his younger brother, and we reconnected, but the vibe wasn’t the same. He wouldn’t respond for days, pick up my calls or generally communicate. Eventually, he stopped responding altogether. He’s much bigger now, and I don’t really like telling people we were friends because it might look like clout-chasing.

“My mum still loves her” — Temi*, 29

I don’t have a personal experience, but my mum used to be friends with a popular Nollywood actress. The actress would come to our house and sometimes leave her daughter with my mum whenever she travelled for jobs. My mum treated her like a sister, and even some of her family members thought she was doing too much for her. Then the actress got her big break, and everything changed. She stopped coming around and stopped picking up my mum’s calls. Around 2020, they ran into each other at a mutual friend’s event. She apologised and gave my mum a new number, but nobody has been able to reach her on it. My mum still talks about her lovingly, but she’s hurt.

“My friend blocked me” — Derin*, 30

My friend is a popular beauty influencer, and we stayed friends even after she started getting famous. At some point, she began posting that her friends were parasitic and insincere. I even asked her if I’d done something to upset her or crossed a line, but she said I hadn’t. Then, around 2023, she went on an influencer trip to another country and stayed there for weeks. I found out from Instagram and tried to message her on WhatsApp. That was when I realised she’d blocked me. I still don’t know what I did. At some point, I accepted that whatever friendship we had was probably over. I don’t want to force myself into anyone’s life.

“We only talk because we’re family” — David*, 27

My cousin is a behind-the-scenes person in the entertainment industry. He works with lots of celebrities and is always hanging out with them. We used to be extremely close. People even thought we were siblings because we were together so often. Before he got into the industry, I could show up at his house whenever I wanted. Since he moved to the Island, though, there’s always an excuse for why I can’t come over. He barely attends family events anymore, either. Obviously, we still talk because we’re family, but it’s nothing like before. We have mutual friends who complain to me that he no longer responds to them, and I don’t even tell them I’m dealing with the same thing.

“We were roomates in uni” — Damola*, 30

My former university roommate is now a popular skitmaker and content creator. To be honest, I was the one who started pulling back when he became popular because I didn’t want to seem like I was attaching myself to his fame. I expected him to notice and reach out, or at least reassure me that nothing had changed. Instead, he also pulled back. We still have each other on WhatsApp, but we don’t talk. I also don’t tell people I know him. Once, I posted an old picture of us from university, and it ended up on a blog. He got angry and asked why I posted it. That was the last time we spoke.

“The friendship is ending soon” — Funmi*, 29

My friend is an actress. She’s not extremely famous yet, but she’s been in a couple of blockbuster movies and does lots of YouTube productions. These days, she doesn’t respond to my messages like before and usually says she’s busy. She even missed my wedding, although she sent money and apologised. I just feel like our friendship can never be what it used to be. Give or take another five years, I don’t think we’ll still be close. Right now, it feels like we’re both holding on because we still benefit from each other. I occasionally handle some projects for her, so there’s still a reason for us to stay in touch. But I know the friendship has changed.

“His family refused to share his contact” — Seyi*, 34

I used to be friends with a popular singer. We went to secondary school and university together and even attended studio sessions together. In the early days, I was always around him, and we talked about how I’d always be part of his crew. Then he had a major breakthrough in 2019, and everything changed. He changed his numbers, travelled out and became unreachable. I tried to keep in touch and even went to his family’s house, but they wouldn’t give me his contact. They collected mine and promised he’d reach out, but he never did. He’s not popping like he used to, but he’s still popular. I still wish him well, though.

 *Names have been changed to protect the identity of the subjects.