Elizabeth (33) has moved between Nigeria and the UK throughout her life. In this story, she shares some truly scary experiences she has had in Nigeria, explains why she can’t wait to leave the UK, and opens up about what it’s like connecting with Nigerians who see her as an outsider. 

Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I live in the United Kingdom, and I left Nigeria in 2019. I鈥檝e moved between both countries throughout my life.

Tell me more about that.

I was born in the UK and grew up here, but I went to Nigeria for three years of boarding school, a month of A-levels, and then again for university.

Going to Nigeria for medical school was a way to connect with my culture. I had worked with Nigerian doctors in the past, and they were just built differently. They had incredible confidence and grit; they were resilient in a way that other doctors were not. I wanted to know how they were trained so I could be like them, because they truly inspired me. So, I chose a Nigerian university.

What inspired you to move back to the UK?

I wanted to stay in Nigeria for my National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) year. I was very into public health at the time, and wanted a chance to work in that area for service.

But my parents said, “Absolutely not.” They actually bought the tickets themselves and sent them to me. They insisted that Nigeria was not safe and that I had to come back home.

Let鈥檚 talk about life in Nigeria. What was it like coming here for school?

It was a rollercoaster. It鈥檚 the type of experience that makes you realise you鈥檙e not exactly like the people you think are yours. I came back believing I鈥檓 Nigerian and in my country, but people were very much giving me the vibe that I was not one of them. To them, I was 鈥渙yinbo.鈥�

With time, I learned the mannerisms and the cultural nuances that make Nigerians, and things got better. For example, learning that “come and eat” is just something people say even when they don’t really want you to eat with them.

But medical school was a different experience altogether. It was very challenging by itself.

How so?

Sometimes your colleagues, senior students, lecturers, and doctors can have issues with you for intangible reasons. For example, when I was working in a state hospital in Nigeria before I left, a superior who was two levels above me at the time just really hated my accent.

I used to put on an intentional Nigerian accent in my attempt to blend in, but there were certain words that I hadn’t yet learned to say in a Nigerian accent, so my original British accent would peek through at times. Because of that, she used to make life horrible for no reason, just assuming I thought I was better than her. I would wonder, “How can I think I am better than you? You are my senior.” She just had it out for me and made sure I suffered whenever I worked with her, which was all the time.

I had to accept that people just wouldn鈥檛 like me because of their own preconceived notions of what I represent, even if I don’t actually possess those traits. It was a similar thing in boarding school, but it was worse there because they could physically beat you, and they did beat me a lot.

On the other hand, some people also just adore you because you came from abroad. They would talk to me just to hear my voice and accent. They didn’t really care about what I was saying; they just wanted to hear what I sounded like. For them, I was their first experience of someone from overseas.

So it was a mix of both鈥攐ne half idolised me and the other half hated me. I never knew which it would be when I met anyone new.

How did that make you feel at the time?

It was hard. After completing Junior Secondary School, I went back to the UK. I remember deciding I was never going to go back to Nigeria again. I was completely over it. The experience was much harder than I expected because growing up in the UK, no one had ever disliked me for no reason.

But it made me stronger, because by the time I came back to Nigeria for university and encountered it again, I was a bit more prepared. I just didn’t like the concept of being treated as an outsider in a place where I’m supposed to belong. It was difficult because the whole point of going to university there was to connect with my Nigerian culture and not be an outsider.

Have you been back to Nigeria since you left in 2019?

Yes, I have been back for holidays, weddings, and to see friends.

What has been your best holiday experience in Nigeria so far?

I鈥檒l say last year. I went to Abuja for a wedding, and then I went to Lagos and Ibadan, all within about 10 or 11 days. I got to see many places that I hadn’t seen in a long time, and visited spots I had only ever heard about on podcasts. The restaurants were good, the gym was great, and everything was fun.

Since it was a short burst of ten days and we kept moving across different states, the novelty stayed very much alive. If I had stayed longer, I probably would have started experiencing the typical fatigue that comes with the travel, transport, and infrastructure issues.

Do you see yourself settling permanently in Nigeria in the future, or is the UK home for you?

I hope to retire in Nigeria down the line, maybe when I鈥檓 like 70 years old. Of course, that鈥檚 based on the hope that the country doesn’t get worse by that time.

What has been your worst experience in Nigeria?

There are so many, but I can talk about the top ones.

Wow. Okay, go ahead.

So, first was a scary police encounter. I was in an Uber ride, coming back from the Island to the Mainland late at night, around 2:00 a.m. The police stopped the car near the Lekki Phase 1 gate and ordered us to get out of the vehicle.

My heart was in my mouth because you hear all these stories of what has happened to other people in those exact circumstances with the police. They didn’t physically harm us; they just made us get down and asked, “What do you have for us?” But the fact that they ordered us out of the car entirely made it much scarier than a regular checkpoint stop.

That鈥檚 always scary. Glad to hear it wasn鈥檛 worse than that.

Thanks. Next was a near-death experience at Tarkwa Bay. At the jetty, the boat wasn鈥檛 secured properly, so as I stepped off, it slipped, and I fell into the water. There was maybe only an inch between my head and the concrete wall as I tumbled all the way into the water. It was very close to being a completely different story.

Thank God I can swim. I swam up, and people from the shoreline and staff members ran over to pull me up because the jetty wall is quite high, and it鈥檚 hard to get out on your own. I still proceeded to do what I went to Tarkwa Bay to do before going home, because I couldn’t come all that way for nothing.

What could possibly top a near-death experience, though?

Getting sexually harassed by a senior doctor?

It was my very first night in the Obstetrics and Gynaecology department at the hospital where I was working. In between operations, while waiting for the nurses to prepare the next patient for the theatre, the senior doctor asked me to follow him to a separate location to copy some case notes.

We got into the room, and he locked the door behind us. When I asked what was going on, he said, “You know why we are here.” I replied that I only thought we came to write notes. Then he said something that infuriates me to this day: “You鈥檙e from London na.” As if there is some automatic correlation between being from London and being promiscuous.

I demanded he let me out or I would scream. He still wouldn鈥檛, so I began counting down, “Three, two…” and then he opened the door. I was so afraid because he was a senior doctor who had been there for years; I thought people wouldn’t believe me.

I chose not to file a formal report because I鈥檇 experienced something similar before during my one month in a Nigerian A-level school. The authorities didn鈥檛 believe me over the maths teacher who鈥檇 worked there for years. Anyway, I told my fellow house officers. They were males, and they agreed to protect me by immediately offering themselves instead whenever that specific doctor tried to pick me as his house officer. Thankfully, about a week later, he was transferred out of the team entirely.

Sorry you had to go through that.

Thanks.

What about your best experiences in Nigeria?

I鈥檒l start with winning the inter-house sports events at my secondary school three years in a row. I was a sprinter鈥擨 ran the 100m, 400m, and 800m鈥攁nd I did cheerleading as well. Graduating from medical school was also a major happy moment.

It was also great randomly running into celebrities in Lagos. You could just attend a launch party for a drink brand and find yourself taking pictures on stage with celebrities.

What are your favourite and least favourite things about Nigeria?

My least favourite thing is the sense of helplessness within the country. There is a lot of helplessness about what can be done to improve or change things; people are demoralised, and while I can’t completely blame them, it is unpleasant to experience.

My favourite thing is the exact opposite side of that same coin: when given the right opportunity to succeed, Nigerians do incredibly well. It is very inspiring. That was the main reason I went there for university in the first place鈥攕eeing Nigerians who were doing super well globally. It is interesting how a Nigerian in one context can be so inspiring, yet in another context, the environment can be deeply demoralising.

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Let鈥檚 talk about life in the UK now. What is your typical routine?

My routine is quite simple. I get up, pray, go to the gym, come back, and get my baby ready for nursery. I take him to nursery, or my mum-in-law helps drop him off, and then I go to work.

When I get back from work, I pick him up and handle his evening routine. Then I take care of any additional administrative tasks that come home with me from work. On some evenings, I go to church for choir practice, and on others, I hang out with friends. I don’t go out on weekday nights, but I do on weekends.

What do you do for fun in the UK?

I schedule hangouts with my friends. We plan activities like pottery, painting, arts and crafts, or anything novel to us. During the summer, there are a lot more events, so we go to concerts, parks, and swim.

What are your favourite and least favourite things about living in the UK?

My least favourite thing is the tax. I pay 40% tax. I understand that it鈥檚 a necessary evil, but it鈥檚 still a lot.

My favourite thing is having most of my family here. I have my husband, my son, my parents, my grandparents, and my cousins, all here with me.

There鈥檚 a growing wave of anti-immigrant sentiment in the UK. What has that been like for you?

It is very sad to see because the UK depends heavily on immigrants to function across every single sector. It hasn’t affected me directly, but I do academic research on this topic regarding International Medical Graduates (IMGs). My research looks into how they are disadvantaged by the exam culture in the UK because they weren’t brought up in the same system, leading to higher failure rates.

On a societal level, it is very worrying. In 2024, the year I gave birth, there were major riots across the country with rioters trying to harm people of colour. The police put it down, but the sentiment is still there; there was another march just a few weeks ago. It makes you worry about who you are working next to and whether they are online, writing hate comments.

The political rhetoric claims immigrants are taking all the jobs, but it鈥檚 not true. For example, I have taken part in hiring processes here. By law, we have to assess all the British applicants first, and we can only look at international candidates with visas if those local options are exhausted. The right-wing media simply stoked the sentiment because it is an easy way to divide the country.

Have you encountered racism on a personal level?

The last time someone was overtly racist to me was on a bus in London, which is ironic given how multicultural London is. I had my headphones in, so thank God I didn’t hear the exact words she was saying, but it was an elderly white lady. I was sitting in a regular, non-priority seat, and she had plenty of options to sit elsewhere.

Instead, she stood right in front of me and demanded I give up my seat. I just kept playing my music and watched her face squeeze as her mouth moved. The passengers around us looked deeply offended by the horrible profanities she was spewing, but nobody stopped her. That is how the UK is鈥攗nless it is outright physical violence, people generally mind their own business.

I chose not to let it ruin my day or get offended, so I just kept my headphones in and remained seated until my journey ended. It didn’t make a difference to me.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in the UK?

I鈥檒l say seven. I still want a better quality of life than I can get here. So, I am actually hoping to leave the UK very soon. With the medical work that I do, I can get paid a lot more and live a much happier life in places like Australia, Canada, or even the United States. The time is coming for me to move somewhere else, and to be honest, I can’t wait.

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Success* (28) is a medical doctor who moved to the UK to escape insecurity and poor salaries. In this story, she shares her experiences with the culture shocks of British medical practice, racist microaggressions and why she finds herself praying less often since relocating to the UK.

Where do you live currently, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I live in the United Kingdom (UK), and I left Nigeria in early 2025.

What inspired you to leave Nigeria for the UK?

Everything. But let me start with the insecurity. I grew up in the northern part of Nigeria, so I saw firsthand the terrorism and religious intolerance. When I was young, there were times we had to be searched with bomb detectors before we entered church after a church had been bombed on Christmas Day.

Another catalyst for my relocation was the salaries for doctors in Nigeria鈥攊t鈥檚 just too little. When I practised in Nigeria, I earned 鈧�300,000 per month, and that was barely enough to cover my basic needs. In addition to the reason I mentioned, I had always wanted to leave Nigeria as early as my primary and secondary school days. I got a peek at what life was like abroad from friends who vacationed abroad with their parents. 

It鈥檚 the reason I studied medicine. I knew that healthcare workers were highly sought after in many parts of the world. So I knew it would give me a good chance to leave Nigeria.

What was life like for you in Nigeria before you left?

Working in a private hospital, I was making about 鈧�300,000 a month. I was only able to afford a shared apartment with that. But it was a terrible experience. We only had electricity between 4:00 AM and 6:00 AM. So I had this huge power bank that I鈥檇 charge at work and in church on Sundays. That was how my life was in Nigeria; it wasn鈥檛 easy.

As you said, doctors are in high demand in many parts of the world. Why did you choose the UK?

I chose the UK because the migration pathway for other countries is quite expensive. Though we are highly sought after, the process doesn’t come cheap. The UK is relatively cheaper than other countries, but it still cost me about 鈧�7 million to migrate. That was because I passed my exams on my first try. Some people have had to write the exams twice or thrice, and that increases the cost.

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There are very few doctors in Nigeria, currently about one doctor for every 10,000 patients. Do you have any feelings about that?

It does bother me because I’m always thinking about my family back home. What happens when my parents or other loved ones need medical care? Here, people can walk into the hospital almost dead, and we鈥檙e able to get very good outcomes because we have all the equipment we need. It makes me think back to my time in Nigeria, where we didn’t have the equipment, and we didn’t even have enough hands. It makes me worry about my family, but I can only put them in my prayers.

I also think about the times when I was back home in Nigeria, when I couldn’t really take care of my basic needs鈥攊t was difficult for me to get a place, having a car could only be a dream, and I was basically living off my parents. I think about all of these things.

With the way the Nigerian government is running the country, I don’t think you can blame doctors for leaving. I don’t feel guilty because I know that the Nigerian political system did not create a conducive environment for us to stay.

Doctors spend a lot of time in school, go through a lot of difficult exams, and a lot of money is spent training us. But when we graduate, we get paltry salaries, worth next to nothing. A lot of doctors have to work in multiple hospitals  to make ends meet. I did that too: I would work a morning shift in one hospital and then a night shift somewhere else. That鈥檚 the reality for many doctors in Nigeria.

Yes, Nigeria needs doctors. But leaving is the best option at this time. We want a good life for ourselves and our families. We want safe lives too. I鈥檝e heard of doctors getting kidnapped back in Nigeria. It’s really crazy.

How has life been in the UK so far?

My life is much better compared to when I was in Nigeria. First of all, I have a better work-life balance. I don鈥檛 have to work two jobs just to make ends meet. There鈥檚 a 48-hour cap every week. You are not meant to work more than 48 hours a week. So this means  I have time to do other things with my life.

I can afford my own place. I have savings and investments now, unlike in Nigeria, where I couldn鈥檛 afford to do either.

Food here is actually cheaper than back home. When I was in Nigeria, I always had anxiety about going to the market because the spaghetti I bought for  鈧�500 this month could become 鈧�1,000 the next. But here, prices are very stable. I think my life here is better. I can support my family more, and I have a better community. Overall, it鈥檚 just better.

What鈥檚 your support system like?

I don’t have any nuclear family here; I’m the first person in my nuclear family to actually leave Nigeria. I have some members of my extended family here, but we are not so close.

But I have my church members. I also go to the gym, and I鈥檝e made friends there. I have friends at work too. I know some people say not to make friends at work, but I鈥檝e had a different experience. I have really nice coworkers.

Now my support system is actually growing. I’m getting to know more people and becoming acquainted with my environment.

Are these friends Nigerian?

The majority of friends I鈥檝e made here are Nigerians or fellow Africans. It鈥檚 just easier to make friends with people you share similar cultures and backgrounds with. For example, the town I live in is white-dominated, so once you see a Nigerian, there’s this internal joy that you feel. It’s like any Nigerian at your workplace is automatically your friend.

I think if you鈥檙e able to have non-African friends, that means you both must have a very strong bond for that friendship to actually work out, because you鈥檒l have very little in common.

Have you felt any sort of discrimination or racism since you arrived in the UK?

I have, but it鈥檚 nothing overt. What I feel at times is what we call microaggressions. An example was when I was looking for a house; landlords would see my name,, noticed that it doesn鈥檛 sound British, so they wouldn’t call me for house viewings.

But at work, I don’t feel any form of racism from my colleagues or from patients. The National Health Service (NHS) has a strict policy against racism. If any patient is racist to any doctor, that patient can be ordered out of the hospital, as long as they don’t have an emergency condition. So patients are cautious about what they say.

It鈥檚 the same with colleagues from other nationalities who are non-African. I notice that whenever they are talking to me, they try to carefully pick their words because they don’t want to come off as offensive. I think that can also affect making friends with non-Africans, because they鈥檙e always second-guessing everything they say. That doesn鈥檛 allow for real connections to form.

What about the growing anti-immigrant rhetoric? Does that make you feel uncomfortable?

It has created a bit of uncertainty because the policies are constantly changing, and you don’t know which policy they will come up with next, or how it will affect you. The  Prioritisation Act, for instance, basically says that UK-trained doctors have to be considered for jobs first before doctors from other countries. This was passed after I came here.

I鈥檝e heard British doctors at work talking about how immigrant doctors are taking their jobs. Initially, when I came to the UK, I was always telling people that I got my job from Nigeria. But I noticed they were not really happy to hear that. It was more like, “Okay, you’re one of the people who took our jobs from us.”

I felt guilty about it for a very long time. But I had to deal with the guilt and tell myself that I got the job because I deserved it, and I worked for it. With time, I stopped telling people how I got my job. I only mention it to people I really feel comfortable with.

But one thing I always say is that there’s love at home. So if they say that I can’t stay here anymore, I’ll go back to my country.

Apart from working, what activities do you get up to in the UK?

I’m kind of an extrovert, so I spend more time outside than at home. During my free time, I go to the gym. I’m also learning how to swim. I sing, so I’ve joined the choir in church. I love going to shows too. During the summer, there are usually events happening around, like Afrobeats concerts. I usually go for those kinds of things.

I visit my friends, and my friends come over to see me. I travel, and it’s safe. I鈥檝e always loved travelling, but in Nigeria, I couldn’t really travel so much because of the insecurity and the accidents. But here, the roads are freer, and it’s safer, so I travel easily without any restrictions or any anxiety that something bad will happen to me.

I also use my free time to bulk cook. You can’t be late to work; there’s a very strong work ethic here. So when I’m not at work, a huge chunk of my time is spent preparing for my next period at work. I clean my house, iron my scrubs, and cook in bulk so that nothing delays me when I’m going to work the next day.

What culture shocks did you experience when you arrived?

They like queuing. There’s a queue for everything. There was a time when I first arrived, and I wanted to jump the queue with my normal Nigerian mentality, and someone confronted me about it.

Another thing is that everyone tries to be polite. Unlike in Nigeria, where people show their anger. For British people, even when they are really angry, they smile, and they try to be calm. Trying to unlearn that Nigerian directness so you don鈥檛 get labelled as aggressive is not easy.

It鈥檚 also the same at work. You have to learn how they communicate. In Nigeria, we have a direct way of communicating; you can tell people exactly what needs to be done. But you don’t want to look patriarchal in the UK, so there’s a way you try to use flowery words: “Oh, would you like to do this?鈥� 鈥淒o you think it will be okay if you do this?”

Also, unlike in Nigeria, where you can gossip and make some jokes at work, you can’t just make any type of joke here because it may be offensive to the next person. I miss the laidback work culture that we have in Nigeria.

As for the accent, when I came here initially, it was difficult to hear what people were saying. In Nigeria, I used to believe I had a very good command of English, but when I came to the UK, I was taken aback by people asking me to repeat myself because they couldn’t understand me. At times, I have to spell a word to make them understand my pronunciation of it. For someone who learned English as a first language back home, that was a big shock.

Definitely. How did you manage?

I try to speak as slowly as possible so that people can hear me, and I don’t get offended if someone tells me to repeat what I say. Also, I try to demonstrate. When I’m conversing with a patient, if I want to talk about any eye pain, I may just point to my eye so that they can easily get what I mean. I also avoid using big words or complex grammar and just try to use the simplest English possible, and that actually helps.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy would you say you are in the UK?

I’ll say 20.

Wow.

I feel that all the things Nigeria took away from me in 27 years cannot be gotten back in one year. It’s a journey, but so far so good.

I am happier in the UK. I’m less anxious, and I’m praying less. I know people might see that as a bad thing, but in Nigeria, most of my prayers were built out of anxiety: “Let me have food to eat,” “As I’m going to work, may an okada not crush my leg,” “May I not be kidnapped,” “May I not have an accident.” All those kinds of things. I don鈥檛 have those anxieties anymore.

Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me . For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).

Mike (43) moved to the UK for a master鈥檚 degree when he became disillusioned with life in Nigeria. In this story, he shares the struggle of being a mature student in data science, and how a Christmas holiday in the UK turned into a permanent relocation for his family after he secretly applied for jobs on his wife’s behalf.

Where do you live currently, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I currently live in Kent, United Kingdom, and I left Nigeria just after the pandemic in January 2021.

Was that your first time leaving the country?

No, I have travelled out of the country several times. My spouse and I go on vacation almost every year, but that was the first time I knew I was going for the long term.

What inspired you to make that move?

I saw the trajectory things were taking in Nigeria, and realised it was not the kind of place I would like my children to grow up in. There was this general sense of helplessness, especially after the EndSARS protests and what happened at the Lekki Toll Gate.

It felt like there was no sense of order. To get things done, you had to know. I saw no structure; everything had to do with power or who you know. From my perspective, I just saw a continuous breakdown of law and order, and I decided I couldn鈥檛 handle it anymore.

But what was life like for you before you left?

Life was not bad at all. I was a project manager in an oil servicing firm, and my wife was doing very well, too. She had risen up the ladder to be a Managing Director at a fintech after years in investment banking. Life was good. We were living in our own house, we had two cars, and my children were going to some of the best schools around.

However, there was this general sense of insecurity. Once, my children鈥檚 school bus didn鈥檛 come back to drop the kids off on time. We would learn later that it was due to traffic, but when we couldn鈥檛 reach the drivers and the teacher with them, our first thought wasn鈥檛 a possible traffic jam. The first thing we thought was, “Have they kidnapped our kids?” You could feel the general insecurity in the country, and you know it can touch you at any time, regardless of how much you have.

How did you move to the UK?

I came for a Master’s in Data Science. During my studies, my wife and kids came over for a Christmas holiday. My wife is highly skilled, so I took her CV and put it out there without her knowing. Within a couple of days, she was already getting calls for interviews from some top companies. She couldn’t believe it.

She was actually against relocating at first because of the life we had built in Nigeria. But the speed with which those calls came flipped the switch for her. I also took her to see friends she knew over the years who were already established in the UK, living comfortably in good neighbourhoods. It gave her a picture of what was possible within a short period if we chose to build a life here.

She didn’t go back after that holiday. Her role in Nigeria was remote, so she worked from the UK for a couple of months until she got a very good job here. Our house in Nigeria was locked for about five years before we rented it out recently.

So staying wasn鈥檛 always the plan?

From my perspective, it was the plan. But my wife wasn鈥檛 too keen. She was at the peak of her career in Nigeria. But when she saw how fast she was getting senior management interviews here, things changed. It took her 12 years to reach that level in Nigeria, but within three days of putting her CV out in the UK, she was getting calls. This was just after COVID, so there was a high need for specialised skills. She got a job offer that sponsored her, so we have been under her skilled worker visa.

Since you moved to the UK, have you been back to Nigeria at all?

Yes. The year I travelled, I lost my dad, so I came back for his burial. But since my wife and kids moved here, we have not been back.

What was your first experience like arriving in the UK?

It is totally different from coming for a three-week vacation. This was the height of COVID, so restrictions were still in place. For the first time, I saw how things really work. I remember going to a bus stop, and my app told me the bus would be there at 3:15 PM. At 3:15 PM on the dot, the bus came; I almost shed a tear. In Lagos, you can’t have public transport that can be timed.

I realised that here, even with a menial job, you can afford an okay life. As a security guard in McDonald’s, you can afford to travel somewhere in Europe once or twice a year for a holiday. Menial jobs are not looked down upon. My wife insisted I shouldn’t work so she could fund my lifestyle, but as a man, I had to work. So I did some menial jobs while I was a student. I was able to get warehouse and care gigs while in school.

Why did you choose Data Science, and what do you do now?

I chose Data Science because I knew the world was moving towards machine learning and AI, and I had a background in mathematics and computer science. Studying it was hard because I was in my late 30s, struggling alongside 22-year-olds from India and Nigeria. Now, I still work in data, but I focus on data and AI governance.

What is life like now?

When I finished school in Leeds, we moved to Kent, where we live now and where my wife鈥檚 job is. At the time, things changed, and she went from a largely remote schedule to a hybrid one. But it was also time for our kids to start secondary school, and the best Grammar Schools are in Kent, so it just made sense.

Also, Kent is much closer to London. It鈥檚 about 45 minutes by train, or an hour if you drive. And London is basically like Lagos in terms of jobs. The moment I changed my address when we moved, I started getting a lot more job offers.

So the move has been great, and life is good. My wife has a great job, I have a good job too that I really enjoy, and our kids are in great schools.

Sounds great. Which was your favourite city to live in?

I was resistant to moving from Leeds because it was less expensive; when we moved to Kent, we were paying almost double the rent. But I have grown to love Kent. It is quiet and reserved, and if we want the bubbly vibe of London, it is just 45 minutes away.

How much contact do you still have with Nigeria? Do you see yourself returning permanently?

Nigeria will always be home; we still have a house there. But most of my friends are no longer in Nigeria; they have moved to Australia, Canada, or the UK. My close friends and I actually meet regularly in the UK. I still try to stay up to date on Nigerian news, but the connection is not as strong. Once we get full citizenship, we might make more frequent trips home.

As for settling long-term, there is a possibility because we still have property in Nigeria. At the same time, I like the idea of being a global citizen, so it might not be Nigeria we retire to鈥攊t could be Botswana or Rwanda鈥攂ut Nigeria will always be a base.

What is your support system like in the UK?

The move to the UK can either make or break you as a family. If there are any cracks in your relationship, it will widen them. That鈥檚 why we hear of so many people ending up divorced after they move here. But if your relationship is solid, it can bring you closer. For us, it has made us closer.

We were both very intentional about picking roles that allow for remote or hybrid work. My wife is almost fully remote, and I only go to the office once every two weeks. This gives us time to be part of our kids’ lives.

In Nigeria, we had help, and our parents were around, so we would leave at 5:00 AM and not be back until 10:00 PM. We wouldn’t see the kids awake until the weekend. Now, I drop my daughter off every day and pick my son up from the train station. We do homework together.

We have no help here, whereas we had two in Nigeria. So we’re a lot more hands-on with our children now. If you are the kind of man who has a problem with doing housework, you will struggle. I鈥檝e always been hands-on, so it has worked out great, and it has been one of the best decisions we鈥檝e made.

Was there a culture shock in terms of raising kids in the UK?

Yes. Here, you have to be more intentional. Nigerians believe very strongly in the saying about sparing the rod and spoiling the child. Here, you have to move away from that mindset unless you want social services to take your kids away. You have to find other ways of thinking about discipline, like maybe taking away privileges instead.

Any other culture shocks in general life?

Ironically, I sometimes miss the “anyhowness” of Nigeria. For example, the driving test in the UK was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life. It鈥檚 harder than getting a job.

What was so difficult about the driving test?

It鈥檚 about recalibrating your mind to be on the other side of the road. We are not used to obeying road signs in Nigeria. Driving there is basically a 鈥渇ree-for-all.鈥� So here, you have to unlearn those bad habits first. I think it is actually better if you have never driven in Nigeria before you come here, because you won’t have to unlearn so much.

What has been your worst experience?

My first winter was terrible; I realised I didn’t pack the right types of clothes. I hate the weather here. Even now in May, it is still cold.

One other bad experience was being kicked out of my apartment at night with my wife and kids. This was when they came for the Christmas holiday. I was staying in my one-room apartment in a shared flat for students while my wife was doing her job interviews. I had signed a rule saying multiple people couldn’t stay in the room. I think a housemate ratted me out to the landlord. He came knocking, saw my family, and said they had to leave that night or he鈥檇 be fined by the council.

We had to hop on a bus at midnight to stay with my wife鈥檚 cousin in a different city. We spent five days there, and within that time, she got the job offer that allowed us to rent a two-bedroom house. That night was terrible; I felt like I had put my family in a mess.

Wow. What has been your best experience?

The best part is just how quickly we鈥檝e been able to settle. Within three years, we had bought our house and were both in very good jobs.

So it all worked out in the end. What do you like most about the UK?

I like that if you are focused, you can plan your life for the next 10 years. You can build a skill and grow. I love how orderly it is and how intentional they are with everyday living. I could sleep without locking my door and not be worried. I recently went up north, and at one point, I was driving at 2:00 AM, and I just thought about how I wasn’t worried about kidnapping or potholes. My only worry was falling asleep at the wheel. That relative safety is something I really value.

You mentioned you are waiting for your paperwork

Yes. It is just a matter of about ten months now. If you are on a skilled worker visa for five years, you qualify for Indefinite Leave to Remain (ILR). So we鈥檙e almost there.

Does the anti-immigrant rhetoric in the UK make you feel uncomfortable?

We were faced with tribal sentiments back in Nigeria, so it’s not new territory. I only worry about my kids because they already face some of that rhetoric in school. It鈥檚 about having conversations with the kids about reality and helping them understand that the world has people like that.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in the UK?

I鈥檒l say eight and a half. If you can take away the anti-immigrant rhetoric and give me Nigerian weather, it鈥檒l be a ten.

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Samson* (20) left Nigeria when his family migrated to the UK. In this story, he talks about the initial loneliness of life in the UK, why he decided to move to Georgia for his studies, and the reality of experiencing overt racism in a country where some people are still shocked to see Black people.

Where do you live currently, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I currently live in Georgia. I left Nigeria with my family in 2023, and we moved to the United Kingdom (UK).

What inspired you to leave Nigeria?

We were looking for better opportunities, basically. My mom got a job there, and we all decided to move. My mom got there first, about five months before the rest of us joined her.

What was that experience like for you?

Obviously, I was excited, but I also felt sad because I would be leaving my friends behind. I get very attached to people. But I got over it eventually. I鈥檝e met new people here. And I still talk to my friends in Nigeria a lot too. 

When we arrived, we stayed at an uncle鈥檚 place for about four months. He made sure we did not lack anything. So it was a very relaxed start to life in the UK. But not being able to do anything or go out with friends got to me quite a bit, to be honest.

It has been a good experience; it just came with a bit of loneliness. But I wouldn鈥檛 change anything about it.

What are you up to now? 

I鈥檓 studying medicine in Georgia. I moved here in 2025.

Studying medicine in the UK is quite expensive as an international student. My parents cannot keep up with that kind of expense. So I looked for cheaper alternatives around Europe, like Romania.  I eventually settled on Georgia.

How are you finding life in Georgia?

It鈥檚 fine, I guess. It is a less developed country than the UK. When I first got here, it felt a bit like mini Lagos because of the hustling and bubbling. There are still signs of the old Soviet era. You see new, good-looking buildings and older, terrible-looking ones side by side.

The primary language here is Georgian. English is not really spoken among the older people; they speak Russian and Georgian. Some younger people speak English alongside Georgian.

To be honest, it feels like the government here does not care about the Georgian people. You see people begging on the streets in traffic. People really struggle here. Even lecturers and medical doctors struggle so badly in this country.

Coming from the UK, when I convert Pounds to the Georgian Lari, I can live quite comfortably. But the Georgians themselves do not necessarily live a comfortable life; things are very expensive for them.

For me, though, the biggest issue is racism. Some Georgians are not used to Black people, so they can act very strangely around us. 

And you didn鈥檛 experience anything like that in the UK?

Not exactly. I feel racism in the UK is more subtle, more hidden. For example, I had a boss at work in the UK who I think might be racist. But I cannot prove it.  He smiles and acts all nice, but I noticed a pattern of strictly assigning certain tasks to the Black members of staff. That鈥檚 what racism in the UK felt like. You feel like it鈥檚 there, but you can鈥檛 exactly prove it.

And in Georgia?

In Georgia, little kids call me the N-word all the time. You see adults who will be the ones to touch you or brush against you, and then they get offended and keep cursing at you in their language. You see people recording you; some might do it out of curiosity, but some actually record you to post you on the internet. It happens all the time.

How does that make you feel, and how do you react to it?

I grew up in Nigeria, where everybody was the same colour. Even when we saw white people, we didn’t really care. So, I don’t really care about it. I know it affects some people, but personally, I couldn’t care less, to be honest.

Does it ever make you feel unsafe?

No, it does not make me feel unsafe. I go out anytime I want. I do anything I want. I really don’t care. If you come to me, we can have a scrap; that is not a problem. But I am not scared of anybody like that.

Please be safe. You mentioned you made new friends. Are these in the UK or Georgia?

Both.

Are they Nigerians, British, or Georgians? How did you meet them?

In the UK, I made friends at work. Most of them are British, some are Albanian, some are Indian, and some are Ghanaian. I don’t really have Nigerian friends in the UK unless you count people at church. But those are acquaintances, not really friends. In Georgia, I made friends at university. Some are Nigerians, some are from the UK, some are Indian, and some are Canadian. It is quite diverse.

Have you been back to Nigeria since you left?

No. The opportunity hasn鈥檛 come up yet. I plan to, but not now. Maybe in the next two years.

If you look to the future, do you see yourself returning to Nigeria to settle at some point, or is your life abroad now?

I think I see my life as being abroad. Obviously, it鈥檚 not completely up to me right now, but I do see myself continuing to live abroad.

Let鈥檚 go back to the UK. Were there any culture shocks you experienced when you first arrived there?

The main culture shock for me was the fact that people don’t go to each other’s houses that much. You can鈥檛 send someone to your neighbour’s house to go and chill. Everybody just stays in their own space. Also, the way they behave toward their elders is different; they do not behave the way we do toward ours in Nigeria. Their idea of respect is different. Those are the two main shocks I had.

What is your favourite and least favourite thing about the UK?

I鈥檒l say my favourite thing is how accessible everything is. Anything you want is accessible, whether online or in stores. My least favourite thing is that I feel like the UK wants to put you in debt. Their taxes are very heavy. It feels like they want you to be broke.

What about Georgia? What were the culture shocks there?

This wasn’t a shock compared to Nigeria, but coming from the UK, I was shocked by the homophobia in Georgia. In Nigeria, people are homophobic, and it is the same in Georgia. Most people are very homophobic, and they are aggressive about it. In the UK, people are very chill about it; I have lesbian and gay friends there. In Georgia, it is very different.

What is your favourite and least favourite thing about Georgia?

My favourite thing is that I have more friends compared to the UK because of university. Also, when I convert Pounds to Lari, I鈥檓 able to live comfortably. My least favourite thing is the constant staring. I get that some of them do it because they don鈥檛 see a lot of Black people and they鈥檙e curious. So I try not to pay much mind to it, but it gets to a point.

What are your plans for the future?

Finish medical school and definitely go back to the UK. I鈥檒l try to build my portfolio and find a good-paying job. If I can’t find a job as a doctor immediately, I鈥檒l find anything related to it and continue building myself.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy were you in the UK, and how happy are you in Georgia?

For the UK, I鈥檒l say an eight. Everything feels accessible. I have family and friends close by, so it is just very comfortable for me.

I鈥檒l say a seven for Georgia. I think Georgia is a hidden gem. Most people shy away from it, but it is very nice if you actually open up to it鈥攖he places, the history, and even some of the people. Not everyone is racist. I鈥檝e met some really good people here.

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(30) spent his early years in the UK for medical treatment, so returning in 2018 for a master鈥檚 felt like a fresh start in a familiar place. In this story, he shares great tips for building community and making friends through activities and social clubs, the pain of being so far away when his grandfather passed, and why he keeps putting off his return to Nigeria.

Where do you live currently, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I live in the United Kingdom (UK), currently and I am based in Manchester. I left Nigeria in August 2018.

I was quite sick as a child, so I spent some of my formative years here, getting treatment. I moved back to Nigeria when I was about five years old. After my treatment, I still had to come over once in a while, for maybe a month or two at a time, for follow-ups and to visit family.

What inspired your move in 2018?

I came to do my master’s; it was a bit of a fresh start. Part of it was because my dad was panicking a bit about my future. I was pleasantly surprised when he offered to pay for my master鈥檚, so I took the opportunity.

I think he wasn’t really sure about my career path because I was doing some writing and working in a few Nollywood and media productions here and there. He wanted a bit more structure for me and was worried about my future, so he suggested I get my master鈥檚 in something a bit more formal. I was already somewhat frustrated in Nigeria, so I thought, 鈥淲hy not?鈥�

When did you finish your master鈥檚?

I did a pre-degree programme for about a year, and then I finished my master鈥檚 in early 2021.

But you stayed in the UK after that. What’s behind that decision?

I quite like it here, to be honest. I鈥檝e built a decent community, and I like the country鈥檚 structure and organisation. I鈥檓 pretty happy here, though I do get homesick quite a lot. I鈥檓 very close to my family, particularly my dad and my brother. I miss them, but I also have some family in the UK and very good friends. Even if I move to Nigeria, I think there will still be a bit of a push and pull.

What was life like for you before you left Nigeria in 2018?

I was working as a production assistant on a few Nollywood movies, ad shoots, and things like that. I鈥檓 a big film buff, so a dream of mine at the time was to be the Nigerian equivalent of Christopher Nolan. In my head, I was going to change the game.

But I realised it was extremely tough work and I didn’t have the patience at the time to be a director. I used to be hypercritical of Nollywood, but after working on a few productions, the constraints they faced made me a bit more sympathetic. I realised it isn’t as easy as it seems from the outside. There are a lot of forces and moving pieces that make it much harder than I thought. I needed to give them more credit.

Let’s talk about life in the UK. What was your experience when you first arrived?

When I first arrived, I was a bit nervous. I had ties back in Nigeria and people I really cared about, so I knew I was going to miss them. I was a bit anxious at first, but then I started to settle. I made friends in my programme, and I already had quite a few friends from Nigeria who had moved to the UK. Honestly, I鈥檝e always been a bit of a social butterfly, so that part wasn’t hard.

What kind of activities do you get up to?

If you really get involved with social clubs, you鈥檒l easily have an exciting life in the UK. There鈥檚 also a lot of opportunity and ease to travelling across the UK and also Europe in a way we haven鈥檛 figured out in Nigeria. I鈥檝e really enjoyed exploring here. My friends even call me “waka-about.”

What tips would you give to someone looking to have fun in the UK?

There are social clubs and things people need to try out. It鈥檚 hard to make friends in adulthood, but just know there are other people also looking for community. You have to put yourself out there. You might even have to start doing things you didn’t normally do before. For example, I got into fitness, running, and hiking.

Nigerians like movies, so you can join a movie club. Some people do painting clubs. There are a ton of things to do. Parties are also great for socialisation, but you鈥檒l mostly find those in bigger cities like London, Manchester, or Birmingham, and you have to be willing to spend a bit of money.

You mentioned you love exploring Europe. What鈥檚 your favourite and least favourite country you鈥檝e visited?

My favourite was Italy. I found it so beautiful, and the weather was warm. It finally hit me how Italy makes so much of the world’s wine. You don’t really get it until you’re there and see vineyards stretching for miles. You can drive for an hour and only see vast vineyards.

My least favourite country was Amsterdam. It鈥檚 not bad, but my friends and I walked past the Red Light District, and I found it a bit off-putting. I know it鈥檚 a big tourist attraction, but I found it really strange. I was like, “Yeah, I don’t want to see this again.”

You’ve been in the UK for several years now. Do you feel you’ve hit the milestones in your plan?

I鈥檓 not close to the milestones, I won鈥檛 lie. A part of me is still thinking I need to come back to Nigeria at times. I have career and personal milestones I need to hit. Compared to what 20 or 25-year-old me thought, I鈥檓 not quite where I want to be in my career, though I鈥檓 making some strides.

I thought I鈥檇 be married by 28, with maybe a kid on the way at 30. That doesn’t quite seem to be on the cards right now, but we鈥檒l see.

Are there downsides to the move?

It depends on your situation. I鈥檒l be honest and say my family back in Nigeria is pretty comfortable. If I鈥檓 out of a job for a month or two, I can live with a family friend for short periods until I鈥檓 back on my feet. Not everybody has that luxury, and the UK can be a bit tough if you don鈥檛 have support.

Overall, I feel safer and more stable here than in Nigeria, despite being more privileged in Nigeria.

Have you been back to Nigeria since 2018?

Of course. I try to come back most Christmases. I think I鈥檝e been back for five or six so far. I didn’t make it the first year I moved in 2018, because I moved in August and coming back in December was too soon. The second time I missed it was because of the COVID-19 pandemic. The third time, my dad decided to surprise me, my brother, and my mom in the UK, so we spent it here instead of travelling back. It was a cool surprise, but after a day or two, I think we all would have preferred to be in Nigeria instead.

Do you have a favourite December experience?

My favourite one was probably 2019. It was just really fun. I just remember non-stop fun. I don’t know what was in the water that December; it was just a great time. My close friend鈥檚 wedding also added to the fun.

What are your go-to activities when you visit Nigeria?

I have a love-hate relationship with Nigerian concerts. I do enjoy certain artists’ concerts because they tend to start on time and have decent opening acts and sound. But I have such a strong beef with some Nigerian artists because they won鈥檛 come out until around 2:00 a.m. or 3:00 a.m. Aren’t you tired yourself? I find it exhausting.

I like plays, so I鈥檒l go to as many as I can. And I also love attending weddings. I enjoy raves too, although the last time I went in December, I was tired by 3:00 a.m., even though it went on for three more hours. I realised maybe I鈥檓 getting to the age where it鈥檚 time to hang it up.

Of course, I鈥檒l catch up with friends, and I really like my family a lot, so I enjoy spending time with them.

My palette has completely adapted to English food and cuisine, but I still enjoy Nigerian food. The only struggle is managing my fitness when I get back to Nigeria because I love food. I have to work out a lot to keep the weight down. In Nigeria, if I don’t wake up super early to run, it gets very humid and hot, which ruins the running experience.

Do you ever see yourself moving back to settle in Nigeria?

I honestly should have moved back about two or three years ago. I think I鈥檓 procrastinating moving back, and all my friends are tired of me saying it.

My dad wants me to work for him, but I鈥檓 not sure I want to do that, and I also have some of my own things going on. I don’t want to completely rely on him. I know I sound like a typical nepo baby who wants to do their own thing, but I really do want to have my own things going.

How do you feel about the political shift in the West and the rise in anti-immigrant sentiments?

It kind of ebbs and flows. I just wish there were more bold leadership instead of people scapegoating immigrants. There is a cost to immigration that was not calculated, like planning for assimilation and building cultural bonds. Instead, there has been an emergence of enclaves.

I won鈥檛 say I feel unsafe, but it is worrying. I feel like no one knows the direction to lead the country, and because of that, they blame immigrants. That conversation has been avoided for a long time, and anti-immigrant groups take advantage of it. If people in power were honest about mistakes made in the initial immigration policy and had a conversation about fixing it, it would be better.

But in the UK, it is still mostly rhetoric. People are not firebombing things or attacking immigrants in the streets en masse. We still have strong structural protections in place that protect you from overt racism. It鈥檚 not great, but it鈥檚 not the end of the world. I just wish for smarter leadership to get the country going.

What has been your worst experience in the UK?

When my granddad passed away in Nigeria. I just wish I were there when he passed. He was my paternal granddad, and we were really close. I thought we鈥檇 have more time to talk and see each other. That鈥檚 the cost of living in another country.

Thank God for technology; in previous generations, once you immigrated, those people were out of sight and out of mind for years. Technology has bridged the gap, but it鈥檚 not the same as being able to see someone and hug them and tell them you love them face-to-face. Not being there for his funeral made me really sad. He was a warm and funny man who really cared about me.

Sorry for your loss. What has been your best experience?

It wasn’t down to one thing, but probably 2024 and 2025 in Manchester. I was just having a blast. I had this really great friend group, and we spent all our time together. My life became like a season of Friends; we鈥檇 see each other three or four times a week. My job wasn’t too bad, I was travelling as much as I wanted, and I was in a very good mental space. I was really happy. I took my fitness seriously and started running. It felt like everything was just going right.

What are your favourite and least favourite things about the UK?

I hate the weather from September to March when it gets cold, grey, and dark. It鈥檚 expensive at times. It鈥檚 less communal; sometimes it鈥檚 nice that people mind their own business, but I miss that communal feeling in Nigeria.

My favourite thing is definitely my friends. I love my friends. I also really love the UK in the summer, from May to August. There are so many festivals, art events, and theatre. It isn’t free, and it eats into my savings, but I have great memories.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in the UK?

I think overall, I鈥檒l give my stay here an eight and a half out of ten. But at this moment, it鈥檚 a seven.

Some of my really close friends left Manchester, so that was heartbreak. My brother also moved back to Nigeria. We are really close, so I miss him a lot. And more money鈥攎uch more money would help. If my friends were back in town and I had more money, it would be a ten.

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Raphael (29) liquidated a successful pharmacy practice in Nigeria to pursue a master鈥檚 degree in England. In this story, he talks about life in England being faster, harder and more racially hostile than he expected. He also shares how he鈥檚 now found the perfect place for a Nigerian immigrant in Scotland.

Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I currently live in Glasgow, Scotland. I left Nigeria in January 2023.

What inspired you to leave?

Honestly, I felt I knew who was going to win the 2023 election. Before I left, I managed a pharmacy practice, but the cost of living and the cost of drugs were going up. I knew that if the ruling party won the election, things were just going to get worse, and I was right.

What was life like before you left?

Life was good, and income was steady because people will always fall sick and need medication. But for me, pharmacy is about patient care, not just business. As time went by, patients who urgently needed medication would come in and wouldn鈥檛 be able to afford the drugs I had on the shelves. It was difficult having to turn people away.

Even for me, sourcing drugs became difficult. I would pay a certain amount for a medication, and when I came back to restock a couple of months later, the supplier would say the price had doubled. It just wasn’t making financial sense anymore, so I decided to liquidate.

How did you end up going abroad?

I moved to England first on a study visa for a master’s degree. After my studies, I relocated to Scotland because I got a job there that gave me a work visa.

How did friends and family react to your decision to leave Nigeria?

My friends were happy for me because I had told most of them, even before I started applying to schools in the United Kingdom (UK), that I wanted to leave. So they were really happy for me when I got the opportunity to go. It was different from my parents. They were not really on board at first. But they eventually became supportive. I think now they鈥檙e very glad I left because of how much worse things have gotten in Nigeria. If I were still there, I don’t think I could even afford to leave now.

How did you handle the tuition and living costs?

I had paid about 70% of my fees before moving, and when I moved, it was still relatively easy to get a job. I arrived in January and got a job by mid-February. The cost of living in the UK was also lower then. I worked as a pharmacy assistant for a while and then started working in physiotherapy before joining the National Health Service (NHS).

How many years did you spend in England, and what was it like?

I spent about two and a half years in England. It wasn鈥檛 too bad, but I am quite introverted, so I don鈥檛 think I experienced everything it had to offer. Between the academic pressure and trying to stay afloat financially, I didn’t have the time to do as much as others might.

What was your social life like in England?

Social life was good. I made friends in and out of school. I was also fortunate because many of my friends from pharmacy school had already left Nigeria. Barely two weeks after I arrived, I walked into a store to do some shopping and ran into a friend from school. I knew he鈥檇 left Nigeria earlier, but I didn’t know he was in the same city. So having people like that around me really helped me adjust faster.

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Was there any hesitation when you decided to move from England to Scotland?

None at all. I was working in the National Health Service (NHS), but immigration rules in England were starting to change. I  started applying for jobs in Scotland because I found from my research that the cost of living is cheaper and the pay is marginally better. When I got a job offer with a work visa, it was a no-brainer. I packed my bags and ran. That was in July 2025.

How does life in England differ from life in Scotland?

Life in England is fast, and life in Scotland is very, very slow in comparison. Moving here was a breath of fresh air because I take things easier now. You don’t have to run around as you do in London.

Also, the immigration sentiment is different. You experience more anti-immigration sentiment and racist issues in England. Scotland, in contrast, is very welcoming. I was on a train wearing my Nigerian jersey once, and two Scottish men walked up to me to talk about Victor Osimhen. In England, you鈥檒l be in the same situation, and there鈥檒l be someone just staring at you like they’d stab you if they had a knife.

I鈥檝e seen people on social media say people shouldn鈥檛 come to the UK on a study visa. But they need to realise the UK isn鈥檛 only England. In Scotland, things are different. If you study the right thing, you鈥檒l settle easily in Scotland even if you come on a study visa. Scotland is not as competitive as England. There isn’t as much pressure, and the cost of living is cheap. If you’re looking for a UK destination, choose Scotland.

Without a strong support system, England might break you. But Scotland is slower, easier, and cheaper. I love it here.

Interesting. What is your current job?

I work as a physiotherapy assistant practitioner in critical care and the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). It鈥檚 mostly rehab work. Some days are tense, but I enjoy them. It鈥檚 given me a new perspective on patient care.

How did you switch from pharmacy to physiotherapy?

To practice as a pharmacist in the UK, you have to run a specific program. Only a few schools offer it, and there was a massive backlog. I was so intent on leaving Nigeria that I wasn’t patient enough to wait for an offer. I took an offer for a master’s programme that wasn鈥檛 in pharmacy, and that meant I couldn’t practice pharmacy immediately. I started in the NHS as a physiotherapy support worker, got some certifications, and eventually applied for my current role in Scotland.

Do you plan to return to pharmacy eventually?

Definitely. I renew my Nigerian pharmacy license every year, even though I don’t use it. I even plan to write the Canadian pharmacy exams this year. I intend to return to pharmacy practice eventually.

Have you been back to Nigeria since you left?

I haven’t. I might visit for a quick trip in the future, but I don’t see myself relocating permanently back to Nigeria for now. Maybe after Tinubu, if Nigeria’s fortunes begin to turn around.

What is your support system like in Scotland?

I have family and friends, and even my manager at work is very supportive. I work Monday to Friday, so weekends are mostly for resting and recovering before going back on Monday.

What do you do for fun in Glasgow?

As an introvert, my work colleagues usually drag me out for drinks or dinner. Sometimes I go to the movies or just stay home and play FIFA on my TV.

What were your biggest culture shocks?

Just how orderly everything is here compared to Nigeria. The cost of living was also a shock. I realised there are things here that we pay about five times the price for in Nigeria. And the minimum wage is actually enough for a person to comfortably survive on.

What has been your worst experience since moving?

Back in England, I once went out wearing just a hoodie and didn’t check the weather. It snowed all day, and I waited for my bus for four hours. By the time I got home, I almost had frostbite. It was only a few days after I arrived in the UK, and I didn’t know that a hoodie wasn’t enough protection from the snow, especially for someone coming from a hot country like Nigeria. You need to have a winter jacket.

What about your best experience?

Moving to Scotland has been a great experience for me. My time in England was crazy with constant planning and strategising. Since moving here, I can wake up and take life at my own pace. The past ten months have been really good for me.

What is your favourite thing about Scotland?

Most people are welcoming, and life feels slow-paced and relaxed. It鈥檚 perfect for someone like me.

And your least favourite?

The weather. It鈥檚 very cold.

Do you see Scotland as home for the long-term?

I鈥檒l say, for the short to medium term, Scotland is home. Whether I鈥檓 here long-term depends on how the immigration rules change.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in Scotland?

I鈥檇 say a nine out of ten. When the summer comes, and the weather gets better, it will be a ten.

Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me . For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).

Gerry (25) always wanted to get a master鈥檚 abroad. But about two years into Tinubu鈥檚 regime, he decided the time was now. In this story, he talks about life in Scotland鈥檚 Aberdeen, the exciting whims he鈥檚 indulged, and his plans for the future.

听听

Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?

Currently, I鈥檓 in Aberdeen, Scotland. I left Nigeria in January of 2025.

What inspired you to leave Nigeria?

Honestly, for lack of a better word, I just wanted fresh air. I always knew I would get a master鈥檚 degree at some point, and with Tinubu in power now, I felt it was time to initiate my escape from the country. I decided to go abroad for my master鈥檚, and to leverage it to move to whichever country my heart deems fit after I鈥檓 done.

Are you done with your master’s now?

Technically, I鈥檓 done. I鈥檓 in the process of turning in my dissertation. My graduation is just a few weeks away.

Congratulations. Scotland isn鈥檛 a popular destination for Nigerians I鈥檝e interviewed. Why did you choose it?

I鈥檓 surprised to hear that. Being here, you see the opposite鈥擲cotland is actually a prime destination for Nigerians. There are a lot of Nigerians here. In fact, sometimes, I  only interact with Nigerians for months on end.

I grew up in Port Harcourt, then spent my last two to three years in Nigeria in Lagos. And I preferred Port Harcourt, which is significantly quieter than Lagos. So I knew I needed a city that was just as quiet, hence why I chose Aberdeen.

Is Port Harcourt your favourite Nigerian city?

It鈥檚 actually Akure. I鈥檝e been around a lot of cities in Southern Nigeria, and Akure just stands out as a very fun place. I鈥檇 describe it as a perfect retirement city. Most of the businesses there cater for retirees and make people feel as relaxed as possible.

But the thing with people in their retirement era is that there are a lot of big birthdays and burial ceremonies. So if you’re looking for a type of fun that is very Nigerian but not Lagos-centric, Akure is a good place.

That鈥檚 very interesting. But how could you tell Aberdeen would be your type of city before you arrived?

I have a couple of relatives and very close family friends who have been here for over ten years.  That was where my insight came from.

It must have been great having that support when you arrived. But what were you up to in Nigeria before you left?

I worked in marketing. My master’s is also in marketing. I came to Lagos for my National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) in 2022. After that, I got a job at a top marketing agency. I spent a little over a year there and then moved to a health tech startup in an executive position. At the same time, I had side contracts as well.

I lived what I鈥檇 describe as a very unbothered, soft life in Lagos. I wasn鈥檛 paying rent for the years I spent there, so all my income went into my personal needs. I was very independent.

Life in Lagos, as hectic as it was, was a very good career step. I knew I had to be there because that鈥檚 where all the big media and marketing work in Nigeria is done. So between 2022 and 2024, my life was basically all about work.

What was the experience like when you first arrived in Scotland?

When I landed in Aberdeen, it hit me, and I realised I may have made a big mistake. Aberdeen is really far up north on the map. It is a very cold city. So I鈥檇 arrived in London, and it wasn’t that cold, and there was no snow. Then I got on the plane to Aberdeen and slept throughout the 45-minute flight. I woke up to whiteness. Every building, the ground, everything was white with snow.

Climate-wise, they are like close cousins to Scandinavian countries. It’s similar to the weather you鈥檇 have in Norway. The mistake I鈥檇 made was that I was only wearing a sweatshirt. The first week was not a fun experience. I had to battle a horrible cold, and my body was struggling to adapt. But now I can walk out in the snow wearing just shorts.

How have you found social life in Aberdeen?

It鈥檚 not bad at all. You also don’t need a lot of money to relax here. Aberdeen is the sort of city where you can meet literally anybody if you鈥檙e the social type. There is a Nigerian club here called Club Lagos. There are enough Nigerian events that mirror the experience from back home, just in slightly higher quality. On a scale of one to ten, I鈥檒l give the social life in Aberdeen a solid nine.

What activities do you do to unwind in Aberdeen?

I like to go running and hiking on the hills here. There are lots of hills and mountains in Scotland. I鈥檝e been to the lake where the mythical Loch Ness monster supposedly is. It鈥檚 a hilly valley with a mountain range. It was weird realising there are mountains of over 2,000 feet in Scotland. I climbed one of the shorter ones, and it was a really fun hike.

Then there is the food. I think that is actually my go-to fun activity. In the last year, I think I鈥檝e tried practically 80 per cent of the restaurants here. I鈥檓 always dragging my friends to the new restaurants I want to try. They already know they don’t have a choice; once I decide we are going to a restaurant on the weekend, we are going.

What are you eating at these restaurants?

I do not like English or Scottish food. I don鈥檛 fancy it at all. I鈥檒l only eat it if my back is against the wall. They know, too, that their food is horrible, so they鈥檙e very welcoming of foreign food. There are so many Indian, Southeast Asian, Thai, Vietnamese, and Italian restaurants here. I鈥檝e even been to a Cambodian restaurant in Glasgow.

What is your favourite ethnic food?

Still Nigerian food. After that, I鈥檒l say Asian fast food.

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Have you been back to Nigeria since you left?

No, and I don’t intend to if it鈥檚 just for a visit. It鈥檚 just too much work. I鈥檒l have to take three flights to get to my father’s house in Port Harcourt. I don’t have it in me to take three flights right now. If it were possible to take just one flight, I would go easily.

I am open to moving back to Nigeria for work on a permanent basis. But not going back for fun because I don鈥檛 think there鈥檚 any fun to be had in Nigeria.

What are your plans for the future?

I鈥檓 currently in the process of looking at what the short term looks like, but I鈥檓 horrible at short-term planning. Long term, if the UK is still an option in five years, the goal would be to get Indefinite Leave to Remain (ILR) or a Global Talent visa. I鈥檇 use that as a bedrock to explore other countries, particularly Canada, for work opportunities.

What is your support system like in Aberdeen?

I have a very close-knit personal network that is surprisingly very female-driven. Most of my male friends here have moved to different cities. I also have the relatives and family friends I mentioned who have been here for decades.

How have you met new people?

I have met a bunch. A decent chunk of Nigerians live in my building; that was the first entry point. My university is also very African-centred, so I met Nigerians and Ghanaians there. As much as I鈥檓 not a social person, people are drawn to my personality, so I actually meet a lot of people. Mostly it’s through church, school, and work.

What culture shocks have you experienced so far?

“Culture shock” isn’t the right word for me because I was already conversant with Western society before leaving Nigeria. Nothing felt like a shock. But one thing that still surprises me is how everyone keeps in line while waiting for the bus. It might not be an orderly single file, but everyone knows who got to the bus stop first, and they signal to each other in that order when boarding.

Something I had to get used to quickly was that Aberdeen is a very cashless city. Everyone uses a card or Apple Pay. I arrived holding about 拢1,000 in 拢50 notes. That鈥檚 the highest denomination here, and the notes are rare to find because if you need to pay for something that much, people expect you to just make a transfer.

Have you experienced racism in Scotland?

I can鈥檛 say I have directly experienced it, but in certain situations, you feel it. For example, while working at a retail store, I noticed that all the higher-level staff were white, specifically Scottish whites. Systemically, you notice it takes a while to gain “trust” in corporate settings when you鈥檙e an immigrant.

But I think the closest thing to racism you鈥檒l see from a Scot is when they鈥檙e around English people. Scottish people generally don’t like English people; you can see the tension most when English people come to Aberdeen for a holiday in the summer.

What is your favourite and least favourite thing about Aberdeen?

My favourite thing is winter. My least favourite thing is also winter. They are great to look at, but horrible to experience.

What has been your worst experience in Scotland so far?

I haven’t really had a horrible or bad experience. The worst I can think of is my phone going off while I鈥檓 outside. But even then, I can just walk into any electrical or repair store and get it charged. If you are good at quick thinking, you won’t have many problems here. People are generally willing to help or guide you.

What has been your best experience?

There are quite a lot. I spent a weekend with a friend, seeing every major landmark in Aberdeen. We both had cameras and played a “colour game” where we looked for things of a particular colour in every region of the city and took pictures. It was a great, personalised city tour.

A runner-up would be going to Glasgow on a whim, then to Edinburgh for a concert, staying at someone’s house for dinner, and not returning home until Monday morning. That was a whole weekend across two cities in three nights.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in Scotland?

A solid seven out of ten. It鈥檒l be complete when I get a proper job.

Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me . For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).

James* (25) tried to hide his true self for 20 years to survive in Nigeria and get his father to fund his trip abroad. He talks about suffering two horrific assaults that almost derailed his trip, why he left a visa sponsorship job in the UK for the chance of Permanent Residency in Canada, and how he鈥檚 trying to finally live his life freely despite his father鈥檚 denial about his sexuality.

Where do you live currently, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I live in Canada now, but I left Nigeria for the UK first. I left in 2022.

What inspired that move?

I went to the UK for my master鈥檚 degree. I left after my National Youth Service. The initial plan was to travel abroad after secondary school to do my bachelor鈥檚 in Canada, but my dad’s friend scammed him.

What happened?

My dad had never travelled out before, but he wanted his kids to. We grew up in what I鈥檒l call a very middle-class family. My dad imports goods from Canada, so he has friends there. Since he didn’t know how to go about the relocation process, he relied on a friend in Canada to make the arrangements.

At the time, I didn鈥檛 really understand what was going on because I didn’t even believe I could travel abroad based on our living situation. I remember sitting him down鈥攂ecause I鈥檝e always been very direct, even as a child鈥攁nd asking, “Do you have the money?” He revealed he had been saving money for each of us to travel since we were babies.

Anyway, the guy my dad was counting on 鈥渂orrowed鈥� some money from him and ghosted. So that plan fell through. Fortunately, I had chosen to write JAMB that year even though my dad was sure I鈥檇 travel out. So after the travel plans fell through, I started university in Nigeria. I finished schooling, did my NYSC, then travelled abroad for my master鈥檚.

It seems Canada was always the dream destination. So, how did you end up in the UK first?

That part is tied to my sexuality. Growing up in Nigeria was very difficult. I was bullied a lot in school for 鈥渁cting like a girl.鈥� I already knew from a very young age that the only way I could really survive was to run away. I played the “good boy” card and followed the rules, so I was never in my dad鈥檚 bad books. I just told myself, “You need to make 鈥榝uck you鈥� money and run away from this place.”

When he brought up Canada after secondary school, it felt like a dream come true. I now knew that he could actually afford to send me abroad. When that fell through, I went into survival mode for all of university. I was just thinking that if I kept being his 鈥済ood boy,鈥� he would send me abroad, and I would finally be free. By the time I was rounding up university, I was reaching my breaking point.

I had played the good boy for so long, I was exhausted. I had low self-esteem and a lot of self-hate. I basically went into self-destruct mode. I vowed to myself that I鈥檇 get to know myself better and take care of myself after university. A key part of that was planning to relocate with or without my dad鈥檚 help. During the COVID-19 lockdown, I learned some new skills, and I got a job. But it didn鈥檛 pay enough for me to relocate yet.

During that period, I was finding myself and exploring, and people started noticing. My dad, too, noticed, got very worried and cautious, started looking at me in a certain type of way, and it caused issues between us.

I was already applying to Canadian schools, as we had planned, only for him to tell me out of the blues the plan had changed. He decided I should go to the UK instead because he has a sister who lives there, and he wanted me to stay with her.

His sister is the first child, and she is way older than her siblings.  They all fear her, including my dad, so it made sense to him that she keep an eye on me. I tried arguing, but he told me it was the UK or nothing. Canada would have been so much easier for me to start living my life freely, but I had no choice, so I had to change my plans and go to the UK.

So you applied to schools in the UK and got admission?

Yes. Funny enough, the school I chose gave me admission within 24 hours of my application. That made my dad feel even more validated, like it was God saying I should go to the UK. By that point, I didn’t really care; I just wanted to leave Nigeria. The process was seamless, but everything almost blew up before I could leave.

What happened?

As I said, during that period, I was already exploring and becoming myself. I was making some money from my job and starting to meet new people. Then I got “kitoed.”

I started chatting with a guy I met online. He said he stayed near me and we had mutuals on social media. One evening, he kept pestering me to meet him. It was around 9 p.m.; my gut told me not to go, but I had been at home for a long time and just wanted to chill.

I drove to where he directed me. It was deep inside an area with a lot of bushes. I got to an estate, and the gate man let me in. As I entered the house, they locked the door, and a bunch of guys gathered around me. It was a horrific situation. They stripped me naked, beat me, and recorded the whole thing. 

They took my phone, called my siblings and other people on my contact list to demand money. I think they collected about 鈧�300,000. My car had a tracker in it, so my brother called my dad, and my dad tracked my car to the estate. It lasted for about two hours before they let me go.

I got home and had to explain to everyone. I was trying to explain that I didn’t do anything wrong; I just thought I was meeting a friend. It was horrible because I was almost at the finish line with my visa application. My dad was furious and said I wasn’t going anywhere and should move out of his house. I was scared. I thought everything was over. Luckily, the following week, he calmed down and gave me the money for the visa application.

Sorry you had to experience that.

Thank you.

What was it like when you finally got to the UK?

I think I saw the UK through a different lens because of the things that happened before I travelled. I was in a very dark place when I arrived. In that one weekend, I had two of the worst experiences of my life.

The morning after the kito incident, my friends checked up on me. They were all worried by the calls they had received from my attackers. So a friend came by our house with another guy I know, but wasn鈥檛 close to. They said they鈥檇 come check on me later that evening.

When they came, I made food for them, even served them wine. It started at the dining table with the guy touching my leg with his foot. I didn’t think much of it at first. My friend asked if they could spend the night since it was late. I agreed, so we all stayed in my room. I couldn’t sleep because of the trauma, so I put on a TV show. The guy came onto the bed to watch with me and kept playing with my feet. Before I knew it, he was dry humping me. As he touched my injuries from the night before, flashbacks of the attack hit me. I froze, and he had his way with me.

Back-to-back horrific events in one weekend. I couldn’t make sense of it. My spirit was broken. For months, I felt like my body was no longer my own. I couldn’t even tell my friends about the second event because it felt like too much. I held it in until I got to the UK.

That鈥檚 terrible.

I didn鈥檛 arrive in the UK with any of the usual excitement. The only thing on my mind was how not to go back to Nigeria. My aunt is not the nicest person, so I didn鈥檛 expect us to get along great, but I think my attitude at the time added to our issues. When I first arrived, she took me sightseeing, and I think she expected me to act a lot more excited about being in a new country, but I couldn鈥檛 find the energy.

She was verbally abusive, too, shouting and nagging. When I finally got a job, I immediately started stashing money to leave. I called my dad and told him I needed to leave because the energy in her house was so bad. He gave his approval, and I moved out. That was the first time in months that I was happy because I was finally on my own and free.

91大神鈥檚 HERtitude is back this April 2026. Grab your tickets .

What job did you get?

My first job was a warehouse job in a frozen food factory. It was terrible: 12-hour shifts in the cold. But I was just happy to be out of my aunt’s house for those hours. Even when I came back, I would just pack my stuff and go to school to spend the whole day there to avoid her.

I did the warehouse job for a month and then got a care job. It was a better environment and gave me consistent shifts. I lost so much weight from the stress. I would leave for the day with just a pack of biscuits and juice that cost less than 拢1, so I could save money.

So you finished your master鈥檚 in the UK?

Yes. Once I left that house, everything started going well. I got a better job as an admin in a school that paid better. I earned 拢900 to 拢1,000 for 20 hours of work. My rent was 拢500, and bills were under 拢50, so I was saving at least 拢450. It still wasn’t enough because I knew the UK system and how immigrants are at the bottom of the pyramid. I couldn’t see myself doing care work for five years. That鈥檚 how Canada came back into the picture.

I found out about Canada鈥檚 Express Entry and Permanent Residency (PR) process and immediately started working towards that. My dad had already spent what he had and sold a property for me to go to the UK. So I reached out to my brother, and he put his rent for the following year into my account because I needed to show about 鈧�5 million as proof of funds.

I used my savings to process the documentation and the World Education Services (WES) evaluation. While everyone else was applying for jobs in the UK, I was focused on Canada.

Around the time I submitted my master鈥檚 project, I got a job offer in the UK with visa sponsorship, but I declined because I knew my points for Canada would skyrocket once my master鈥檚 degree was official. I also applied for a UK post-study visa, just in case, but I knew I wouldn’t complete it.

When did you leave for Canada?

I got my PR in 2024, months into my post-study visa. It was an adventure and a waiting game. When I got it, I cried because everything I wanted came true. I packed my load and went back to Nigeria. That was my first time back in two years. I went back to process my sister’s study visa so we could both come to Canada. I spent December in Nigeria, my sister got her visa, and in early 2025, we moved to Canada.

What was that like?

It was one of the scariest things I have ever done. I was scared because I was going to an environment where I didn’t know anybody, and I knew how lonely the first relocation was. I didn’t have a job yet, and I calculated that my savings would only last eight months. And I had my sister to take care of.

I had not applied for a job in over a year and had to start from scratch. I kept hearing stories about there being no jobs in Canada and how the companies here are very big on “Canadian experience.” Luckily, I got my job five months in.

Apart from the economic opportunities, has Canada met your expectations?

I never really had any expectations. I just wanted stability and not have to worry about going back to Nigeria. I feel I have achieved everything I wanted, and now I have to start “living,” but I don’t know what to expect. I’m like a newborn baby learning how to crawl.

What about your support system? How is life socially for you in Canada?

I wouldn’t say I have a social life yet, even though I have been here for over a year. I am still socially anxious. I have to make a conscious decision to go outside. In the UK, I never went to see my friends; they always came to me. I was living in the UK as if it were temporary. I didn’t buy appliances or furniture because I knew I wasn’t staying. Now I am working on that mentality because I am here to stay.

I started taking tennis classes to meet people, and I鈥檝e met some at work, but the walls I built up all those years for survival are still there. I can be friendly, but it takes a lot to be my friend. I am trying to make conscious decisions to go out and interact with people, to truly start living my life.

What is your plan for the near future?

I have been in my career for about seven years now, starting as an intern and working up to a senior role. But I don’t really see myself continuing in corporate. I am looking toward starting a company in a different career entirely. I have a five-year plan to move in a different direction before I turn 30. I was a very active child who did dance and drama, but I pushed that away because of the environment in Nigeria. So maybe something along those lines that allows me to explore my creative side.

I am also saving to buy my own home. I stay with my sister now, but hopefully, we will both have our own homes soon. I do not see myself getting married anytime soon.

Are you in a romantic relationship?

I have never been in a romantic relationship. I have just been in survival mode until last year. I鈥檓 starting to think I might be asexual, but that might be tied to trauma. I鈥檝e just not been able to be vulnerable with another person.

I am open to the idea of a relationship, but I never pictured myself in a marriage. I recently started looking for a therapist to navigate my pent-up anger and get in touch with my creative side that was shoved away due to bullying and homophobia. There is a lot of unpacking I need to do.

How does your father feel about your sexuality?

During the whole kito incident, he said he had suspected my sexuality for years before that, but believed it was a phase I would outgrow.

I鈥檝e always been feminine, and my dad never once asked why I was like that. It鈥檚 only outside, in school, that people would bully me and even 鈥渞eport me鈥� to him. So when he said he always knew but thought it was a phase, it clicked for me that he was just in denial.

Where would you say he is with it now?

He is still in denial, and I feel sad for him. I have achieved everything I wanted to, and now it is time to cut that rope. When he鈥檚 praying for me, he still asks God to give me a good wife and children. My mom died when I was very young. My dad became very sick for about a year from the grief, but fortunately, he survived. He didn鈥檛 remarry, and his life has been his work and his children since then. He wants us to live the life he never had. I know he is proud of me, but the next thing on his mind is marriage, and I know I cannot give him that.

When I went back in 2024, before the move to Canada, I had changed a lot. I had cornrows, painted nails, and a neck tattoo.  My dad was cool with the tattoos, but the nails ticked him off. We had a fight about it, and I told him I wasn’t coming back.

But I have so many friends in Nigeria, and I miss them so much. If I do visit, it will always be very brief, maybe two or three weeks at a time and get out of there quickly.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in Canada?

I鈥檒l say eight point five. I am trying to build up my savings again after spending everything to take care of myself and my sister last year. If I can get my emergency funds back to where I want them by the middle of the year, it would be a solid ten.

Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me . For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).

Iliyasu (52) spent four years in Sri Lanka getting his doctorate before returning to Nigeria in 2018. In this story, he talks about the initial culture shocks, the best and worst parts of life on the island and why he was reluctant to leave his new home when it was time to return to Nigeria.

Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?

I moved to Sri Lanka in 2014, but I currently live in Taraba, Nigeria.

You鈥檙e back in Nigeria?

Yes. I travelled to study for a doctorate. After my studies, I returned to Nigeria in 2018.

Was that the first time you had left the country?

Yes, that was my first time leaving Nigeria.

What inspired you to make that move?

I wanted to have my doctoral studies outside Nigeria, so I explored foreign study opportunities. I even got accepted and was on the waiting list to study at the in South Africa. But then, I also had an option to leave for Sri Lanka because my dean, with whom I had worked earlier at the university where I taught, was from Sri Lanka. That was how I got that move.

What were you up to before you left Nigeria?

I was a lecturer. Before that, I had been in the private sector working for a supply chain company that dealt in petroleum products between 2003 and 2007. But I had this feeling that I wanted to teach. I had more money in the private sector and what you could call a more comfortable life. But it was this passion for teaching that drove me to leave that life to become a lecturer.

South Africa and Sri Lanka are sort of odd choices for Nigerians. It鈥檚 usually the UK and the US. Why were these the places you considered?

You know, they say a bird in hand is worth more than ten in the bush. In making these decisions, there鈥檚 a lot one has to consider. Also, having contacts in these countries played a big part in my decision. In South Africa, I had someone there who was already doing some groundwork to help me settle on arrival. It was similar for Sri Lanka. I was introduced to the opportunity through the dean I told you about. Having that contact was important to me.

Did you plan to move permanently, or did you always have the aim of returning to Nigeria?

No, I wasn鈥檛. It probably has something to do with my background being from the north. There鈥檚 less of a desire for immigration amongst northerners than there is in the southern parts of the country. At least that鈥檚 been my experience. All my colleagues who went abroad, even to the United Kingdom and the United States, came back. Those who stayed abroad permanently weren鈥檛 northerners.

So I wasn鈥檛 excited about moving permanently. I just wanted to experience life outside the country and then come back. It might also be because at that time in 2014, Nigeria was not as bad as it is now.

So you feel differently now?

I do to a large extent. When I started this job, I basically started from the bottom as a graduate assistant and worked my way up. But even at the start, I didn’t struggle financially. But now, even as a professor, I struggle financially. I think that shows how things have changed over time. The Nigerian dream seems to be a nightmare now due to the decline in economic power. I was much better off then as a junior staff member than I am now.

Wow. Let鈥檚 talk about Sri Lanka. What was it like?

I was like a newborn child getting to Sri Lanka. I felt that based on my background, I would settle easily because I was used to moving. Having moved from Lagos where I was born and spent my early years to the North where I went to secondary school, university, and eventually married, I was used to making friends quickly and making myself feel at home in new environments.

I had also read about Sri Lanka before getting there, and my dean and his wife told me a lot of stories. But hearing stories is not the same as being in the story yourself.

I immediately got my first culture shock at the airport. I forgot I read that they don’t drive on the same side as in Nigeria. So I put my luggage in the airport taxi, rushed to open the front door, and found a steering wheel staring at me.

There was a bit of a fear factor for me as a newcomer. But there were fellow Nigerian students on the ground, and the really tried to make me comfortable, so that really helped me overcome any fear and settle in.

I think I got used to the country after one year. By the time I was leaving in 2018, I wanted to stay longer. I had found community in church and among my Sri Lankan colleagues. My doctoral class had about fifty of us or more, with some foreigners and then local Sri Lankans. These were relationships I had built over time that made me feel very much at home in Sri Lanka.

You mentioned being married. Did your wife go with you?

I went alone. My wife was on a programme at the time. It was at a point where she couldn’t leave. Apart from that, we were constrained financially to cover ourselves and the kids, because we had four of them. So it was cost-effective for me to go alone and always connect through calls. I also visited Nigeria every year until I returned, except for 2017.

Was that difficult for both of you?

It must have been hard for her, running around alone with the kids. But we went through it, and it was something we found ways to manage. It was difficult, but I think it was worth it.

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What was life like for you in Sri Lanka?

Well, there was a bit of a language barrier. Sri Lankans speak Sinhala, and it’s the only country where that language is spoken. The second language they have is Tamil. But it鈥檚 a Commonwealth country, so quite a number of them speak English.

What鈥檚 actually shocking is that it鈥檚 the older people in the country who are more likely to be English speakers. A lot of the younger ones typically only speak Sinhala. I learned that it was due to to make Sinhala the only language in the country.

For food, they eat a lot of rice. Lucky me, rice is my best meal. The only food-related shock for me was their use of sugar. They use too much in their teas, and they add sugar to their stew and spices.

The weather is a lot like Lagos,  very humid with a lot of rain. The taxi services were very efficient, and there were air conditioners even in the buses. One discouraging thing is installing air conditioning in a room, which I tried twice. It was very, very expensive. The money to do that alone could pay your rent here in Nigeria.

The country is very organised. Electricity and water were not issues compared to Nigeria. We drank directly from the tap over there. Then the same thing with their currency; they kept it controlled. Nigeria is richer than Sri Lanka on paper, but they鈥檝e kept their currency controlled so it doesn鈥檛 fluctuate as much as ours. The situation there is just far better than it is in Nigeria.

Let’s talk about affordability. How did you afford your trip and stay?

My trip was sponsored by the . On the visa, it clearly states you cannot work. If you do, you鈥檒l be sent back home. So covering expenses was difficult; I had to depend on Nigeria almost totally and the goodwill of people to make up for it.

My supervisor also took an interest in me and got to know that we were not allowed to work. So he let me edit his work and gave me a little stipend for it to help me survive.

What were your best experiences in Sri Lanka?

There were a few.

The first one was about my studies. It was a bit difficult getting my money from Nigeria at one point because the Nigerian government stopped our cards from working. But the University of Colombo was very understanding. Some of my colleagues chickened out and went back to Nigeria, but I didn’t.

I once went to see the Dean of the Faculty of Postgraduate Studies, to check if I鈥檇 be allowed to defend my doctoral thesis even though I had not finished paying my fees due to the Nigerian situation. She鈥檚 a woman I like to describe as an “iron lady,” but I managed to find a way around this.  When I got to her office, I found out it was her birthday, and they鈥檙e a pretty big deal in Sri Lanka. I hyped her up, telling her how nice it was to hear that it was her birthday. She was so excited that I was celebrating with her. She told me, “Don’t worry, you’ll be the next person to do your defence.” And truly, they allowed me to defend before completing my fees.

The second was at a think tank called the Institute for Ethnic Studies. My supervisor told me to attend seminars there. On one of those occasions, I met an American who eventually became my landlady. She had been in Nigeria because her dad was an ambassador. As an adult, she had worked in Bayelsa state and was now working for the U.S. Agency for International Development (USAID) programme in Sri Lanka. We bonded over her love for food and my love for cooking. She eventually rented a space to me in their diplomatic compound.

Another one: on the day I was signing off, my supervisor gave me a gift. In Nigerian universities, lecturers don’t give you gifts; it is the other way around. But my supervisor brought out a statue of an elephant, one of . She told me, “You have lived in Sri Lanka, and you have done well. I pressed you a lot, and I thought you would run back to Nigeria.” She was impressed with my work ethic, and that was her way of appreciating me.

It really had an impact on me and how I go about interacting with my own students now. It showed me things can be different from how we normally do it in Nigeria.

There was also the church. I had the privilege to be trained by in Colombo. An elderly man I met in church persuaded me to join their training, the Calvary Seminary. It was an uphill task for me as a doctoral student, but it was a turning point.

I met quite a number of people I ordinarily would not have met. The church was sending me to do relief duty for their pastors. It afforded me the opportunity to travel around Colombo and outside, and most times it wasn’t at my own expense. I had one of the first times in my life preaching using an interpreter. Being a Black African preaching in their church was really great for me. That was one of the greatest things that happened to me.

What were your favourite things about Sri Lanka?

My favourite thing was how the system there just works. My doctorate studies finished at the right time, unlike in Nigeria, where strikes could have made it as long as 10 to 14 years. Everything in Sri Lanka is just far more organised. The people and system are fair; if you deserved something, they gave it to you.

For leisure activities, I loved the beaches. You could even go at night without feeling unsafe, unlike in Nigeria, where you might get robbed. Security there is very good. They respect their police. The police hardly carried weapons; they only had whistles, and everyone obeyed the whistles.

Sounds like a great place, but what didn鈥檛 you like?

The buses are often overcrowded. If you get on at the wrong time, you are in for it. The high humidity could make it a really bad experience. I learned to always hustle for door seats so I could easily get out when I needed to. Also, some of the few tuk-tuk (keke) drivers try to cheat foreigners by messing with the rates on their meters.

There鈥檚 also some level of racism there, whether on the bus or when meeting with people. When I arrived, I found that many of the fellow Nigerians just kept to themselves in their own little community.

But on the whole,  I had a positive experience, and I would go back if I got the chance.

So the racism did not impact your view of the country?

It鈥檚 all about your mindset. I mean, is it any different from the religious biases and tribalism we have in Nigeria? There鈥檚 a saying I like that says if you respond to every dog that barks at you, you will never get to your destination. This world is not perfect. When there is racism, you must have a way to deal with it鈥攂rush it off, move on, and focus on your goals.

You mentioned wanting to go back. Are you exploring immigration opportunities to Sri Lanka or elsewhere?

Yes, I am. Apart from Sri Lanka, I鈥檓 also looking elsewhere. I鈥檓 exploring the talent option for the UK. The US was on my list as well until their recent political shifts. But now I鈥檓 focusing on Europe, Australia, and New Zealand.

I think Sri Lanka is a great place to live. As a professor, I usually have to be a surety for people going abroad for doctoral studies, and I always encourage them to go to Sri Lanka and stay back if they get the opportunity. Many Americans and Europeans even go to Sri Lanka when they retire because it is a good place to live and get value for their money. I encourage people to explore those opportunities.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy were you in Sri Lanka?

I would say eight point five. It was a great experience.

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Timilehin* (30) left Nigeria for the US with just a desire for better opportunities and no long-term plan. In this story, he shares how trading cryptocurrencies gave him the funds for his trip and how he ended up in the US Navy.

Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?

Currently, I live in Atlanta in the United States. I left Nigeria in 2021.

What inspired you to leave?

A friend I went to school with inspired me, and two other things served as a trigger, or push, if you would. While we were in school, my friend always said we should find a way to leave Nigeria so we could do our master’s abroad. It stuck with me.

After we graduated, we couldn鈥檛 make that wish a reality because we couldn鈥檛 afford it and weren鈥檛 doing much. I personally couldn鈥檛 get help from the family front because we didn鈥檛 have the money: My dad was a teacher, so going to school on his salary had been a struggle. I did all sorts of jobs to make some cash, including satellite TV installations, which I took on during my National Youth Service (NYSC) year.

All the while, the idea of going abroad for my master鈥檚 had stuck with me. But the trigger for leaving was the astonishing lack of opportunities. Even as a graduate, most of us couldn鈥檛 secure jobs with our certificates. The EndSARS protests capped it all off. Seeing the government kill so many young people and deny it, made us want to get out. So when we got the opportunity to do our master’s in the US, we took it. I wasn’t married and had no children or strong attachments other than my immediate family, so it was not a difficult decision.

How did you afford the move?

Around 2018 to 2019, crypto started blowing up. Some friends and I got into cryptocurrency, buying and selling Bitcoin and doing Non-fungible Tokens (NFTs). We started getting a little money, and it was that money we used to process our exams like the Graduate Record Examination (GRE), pay application fees, and fund the move abroad.

The money was really useful because, for an average Nigerian, it can be difficult to afford application fees, which can be in the hundreds of dollars. For someone struggling to eat, it鈥檚 a lot to spend on what is basically trial and error, because the schools you apply to may not admit you.

What was it like when you arrived in the US?

It wasn鈥檛 the smoothest experience. I had to spend my first days in a hotel, and it was so expensive; I was worried I was going to end up spending all the money I鈥檇 come with. Also, there were a lot of culture shocks.

What were some of these shocks?

First was the food, which was very different from what I was used to in Nigeria. They also have too many options, making it difficult to figure out their food.

Let’s say you try to get a burger. You would expect it to be straightforward. But you鈥檒l say you want a burger and they鈥檒l ask you something like if you want cheese. Okay, you tell them to add the cheese, then they鈥檒l ask you what type. I didn鈥檛 even know there were different types of cheese back then. It just goes on like that, answering so many questions before you get your food.

Another thing is just how large the US is. It feels like most places are not close by. Everything is at least thirty minutes from where you are. Having a car is not a luxury; it鈥檚 just a necessity if you want to get anywhere. I got a bicycle that I used to ride around. But I guess I got too comfortable, and I wouldn鈥檛 lock it when I left it outside. One time, I travelled, and when I came back, it had been stolen. I found it surprising because it wasn鈥檛 even an expensive one. It cost about $70, so I didn’t expect it to be stolen.

Another shock was the school culture. All the professors are completely fine with you calling them by just their first names.

Then there鈥檚 the attitude towards hosting. In Nigeria, when a birthday celebrant invites people to a restaurant, they鈥檒l handle the bill, but here, everyone is expected to pay for themselves.

What was the settling-in process like socially?

I don’t go out a lot. I didn鈥檛 have much of a social life even in Nigeria, so I have little to compare it with. But in my daily interactions with Americans, I found that most of them think I am Black American when they first meet me, until I tell them I鈥檓 Nigerian. They find it difficult to pronounce my name, so I just tell them my name is Tim or Timmy. That鈥檚 easier for them.

How did you find education in the US compared to Nigeria?

The volume of assignments is a lot. You might do only three courses, but the amount of work, presentations, and assignments is massive. It is harder than in Nigeria, but eventually, I figured it out.

What is your support system like in the US?

I don’t really miss Nigeria in terms of friendships or my support system because most of my friends are here.  My brother is here too. He joined me a year after I arrived in 2022. I also came along with many of my friends, and many of my classmates from the university in Nigeria are here now. I have almost all my support system here鈥攑eople I鈥檝e known for about twelve years now. The only person I have left in Nigeria who would make me come around to visit is my mum.

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Have you visited Nigeria since you left?

No, I haven’t been back. I intend to go, but I haven’t found the time with the way my work is structured. Some of my friends intend to go for two months, but I feel I鈥檇 probably stay only for a week or two if I go, and then it feels like a waste of money for such a short trip.

Do you see the US as a long-term plan, or do you intend to return to Nigeria?

I am very conflicted about that. I want to go back, but then I see what is happening in Nigeria, and I am discouraged. You see the reports online of things like kidnappings or trucks falling on people. These people didn’t even do anything wrong. It鈥檚 just a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. There’s nothing they could have done differently that would have taken them out of that scenario.

So it makes me think: 鈥淒o I want to just leave my life to chance in a place where the chances are not good?鈥� It feels like in Nigeria, everything is just set up to go the wrong way. I鈥檓 hesitant to leave the US, which has a system that works, for one that doesn’t work. But I’m not ruling out the possibility of a return.

Do you like the city you live in?

Yes. Atlanta is actually my favourite city. There is a large Black community here. I鈥檝e briefly stayed in Houston, which feels exactly like you are in Nigeria because of the weather and the amount of Nigerian food, but Atlanta is a perfect blend of Nigeria and America. My least favourite was Chicago because it is extremely cold. That鈥檚 where I did my training for the Navy, and learning to swim in the Chicago cold was one of my worst experiences here.

You鈥檙e in the US Navy?

Yes. I joined the Navy last year. The process was fun at times, but also a little depressing. I didn’t know how to swim very well when I joined. I struggled to learn how to swim in the cold, which is why I said I don’t like Chicago. At the end of the day, I survived and passed.

What made you choose to join the Navy?

Well, it鈥檚 not like how it is in Nigeria. Here, joining the military is very encouraged; you get lots of benefits like tuition waivers and free education for your children. You can also get access to no-interest loans. And, if you are not a citizen, you become eligible for citizenship.

My brother joined the US Army first. But I chose the Navy because I saw it as slightly less physical than the Army.

Interesting. So you鈥檙e a US citizen now?

Yes, I am.

Did you have any longer-term plans when you left Nigeria for the US?

No, I didn’t really have a plan. It was just a case of getting in and figuring out how to go about it once I arrived. We got here and then looked for opportunities to change our status. But now, career-wise, I hope to just keep growing and hopefully, down the line, run a business that鈥檒l allow me to retire.

There has been a lot of anti-immigrant talk in the US recently. Does that make you uncomfortable?

Not really. People have a right to vote, and they voted for whoever is in power. Nothing happening right now is a surprise because this was basically the manifesto of the current administration. It鈥檚 what they campaigned on. I am not affected because I am already a citizen. But I鈥檒l just say that we are getting what was voted for.

Have you felt discriminated against due to your race or nationality?

I鈥檒l give you a recent example. I was bringing up my new 75-inch TV in the elevator, and a white man came in. He saw me with the TV and asked why I was delivering it there. He thought I was the delivery man.

Things like that happen a lot. When people here see a Black person in certain situations, they make silly assumptions like that. If they see you in an expensive car, they might assume you鈥檙e just the driver.

I told the man the TV was mine and I didn鈥檛 let it affect me personally, but I see how it could be disappointing for others who experience things like that.

What has been your worst experience in the US?

My worst experience was in Chicago when I was struggling to pass my swim qualification for the Navy. Others had graduated, and I was left behind, feeling stuck. It made me start wondering why I even came.

Other than that, the US has provided me with opportunities I never would have thought of. It is a level playing ground. The son of nobody can become somebody here.

What has been your best experience?

I鈥檝e had some really good ones. Graduating from school, getting a job, and becoming a US citizen have been really good experiences. Generally, it鈥檚 a really great feeling doing so well for myself and seeing that all my friends are doing well too.

On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in the US?

I鈥檒l say nine out of ten. I鈥檓 not saying ten because nothing is ever perfect.

Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me . For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).

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