, an event content creator, was fortunate enough to see this gap. For over a year, she moved through weddings with a camera and caught the one thing everyone was missing. The need for bridal assistants.

鈥淚t鈥檚 one of those things you can鈥檛 unsee once you鈥檝e seen it. All that money, all that planning, those long months of preparation, and the bride still spends a good part of her own wedding feeling unsettled,鈥� she said.

The wedding industry excels at managing logistics, but it often fails at managing the human. We spend millions on the stage but forget to support the main characters. A bridal assistant’s job is to ensure that the bride isn’t just the host of her wedding but a guest of honour at her own celebration.

鈥淏rides always seemed to be frustrated on their big day,鈥� she says. 鈥淎nd it was simply because the friends they expected to support them did little to nothing on that day.鈥�

The problem wasn鈥檛 bad vendors or poor planning. It was a structural issue. There was a role nobody was officially filling. And everybody assumed someone else was covering it.

Heritage decided to cover it herself.

She launched by Heriana in February 2026, a bridal support service built around one job: being the calm, steady, fully-present person in the bride鈥檚 corner from the moment the day starts till it ends.

What About the Wedding Planner and Bridesmaids?

Nigeria鈥檚 wedding industry isn鈥檛 small. There are planners, coordinators, decorators, makeup artists, hairstylists, caterers, photographers, and videographers. An entire ecosystem of people making a living off the fact that Nigerians love to celebrate weddings lavishly. So if all these people are already at the wedding, what exactly is missing?

Heritage鈥檚 answer comes without hesitation. 鈥淣o matter how saturated an industry becomes, there will always be space for something new. Plus we are providing value by catering to the needs of brides, and once everyone understands they have nothing to lose, they will embrace it.鈥�

That鈥檚 a specific kind of thought process. She鈥檚 looking at a crowded room and asking a different question. She鈥檚 not asking if there’s space? But 鈥渋s there a need going unmet?鈥� Getting that second question right is what separates a business from a passing idea.

The unmet need she identified is sentimental and practical. Someone who wakes the bride, feeds her, helps her get dressed and keeps her outfits in order through the chaos of the full day. Someone whose only job is making sure the bride feels okay.

The Chief Bridesmaid Isn鈥檛 Your Employee

The most common reaction Heritage gets when she explains her work is a variation of the same thing: 鈥淲hat鈥檚 now the work of the chief bridesmaid?鈥�

It stung, especially when it came from close friends. She explained it to them, and they still didn鈥檛 get it. She stopped bringing it up and let the work speak for itself. A bridal assistant and a chief bridesmaid have completely different jobs, and understanding that difference changes everything.

A bridal assistant works behind the scenes. She makes sure the bride鈥檚 outfits are ready and put together, that she鈥檚 eaten, that she feels physically okay and emotionally safe through every transition of the day. She stays out of the photographer鈥檚 frame deliberately. Her job is to be effective, not visible.

The most demanding part of the job isn’t the morning prep, it’s the event itself. Once the day is in motion, a bridal assistant stays on standby the entire time, ready to move the moment she’s needed, while still managing everything else that needs to happen in the background.

Most brides come in warm. They booked for bridal assistants themselves, so there’s already an expectation of trust. It’s therefore imperative that they treat the assistant like a safe space, someone they can be real with. That may however change closer to the traditional ceremony or reception, when the overstimulation kicks in and everyone is just trying to get through the day.

The chief bridesmaid’s role works differently. She鈥檚 the one adjusting the bride鈥檚 dress at the altar during the vow exchange. She鈥檚 the one who can whisper something comforting at exactly the right moment, because she knows the bride personally.

The bridal assistant鈥檚 role is professional. The chief bridesmaid is personal. Together, they ensure that the bride is actually fully covered and cared for.

鈥淭heir responsibilities are totally different,鈥� Heritage says, 鈥渁nd the presence of one doesn鈥檛 affect the output of the other.鈥� Once people grasp that, the scepticism tends to dissolve.

Putting A Price on Emotional Labour is Difficult

Pricing emotional labour is difficult. How do you put an amount on being the provider of steady support? On the fact that someone showed up, read the room, and turned a chaotic morning into something manageable?

Heritage didn鈥檛 guess. She ran a market survey.

I wasn鈥檛 the first in the industry,鈥� she says, 鈥渟o I researched my competitors, analysed their rates against market demand, and balanced that with the unique value I provide.鈥�

She studied economics, and she鈥檚 direct about why her education matters even in a career that has nothing to do with a classroom or a 9-to-5. 鈥淚 didn’t just guess; I put my Economics degree to work by running a market survey to price the value I was providing.鈥�

That combination of industry observation, competitor research, and personal assessment of value is how she landed on a price she could defend. She left what people might say was emotionally right or what clients could afford and followed what the market actually supported. The entry point for BridesCompanion is a 鈧�70,000 package, which covers assistance from the bridal morning all the way through to the end of the reception. Monthly earnings aren’t fixed. It moves with the bookings.

On what she wants a bride to feel, Heritage says, 鈥淚 want them to feel warmth, to feel like she can trust me to be there for her.鈥�

That鈥檚 the whole offer, really. A bride who actually eats before the ceremony, who doesn’t spend twenty minutes frantically searching for her second pair of heels. A bride who walks down the aisle feeling held and helped instead of harried. These small things add up to a completely different experience for the bride.

Heritage spotted the gap in the market, built the offer, structured her brand, assembled a team, and started booking clients. Building a team wasn’t the hard part, particularly because Nigeria has a labour-rich market, and people willing to work as bridal assistants aren’t difficult to find. What matters is the training.

In all of this, Heritage still works as an event content creator, capturing moments that matter. She wasn鈥檛 waiting for the perfect time to take it seriously. She already is. There鈥檚 value to be provided all around you. Like Heritage, you just have to notice, position yourself and hone in on that need.

Next Read: How This Copywriter Leveraged Her Community To Make 鈧�37 Million in a Year

In March 2023, Jennifer had just finished NYSC and landed her first job at a Nigerian digital marketing agency. Thirty thousand naira a month, plus fifteen from her dad, and it was remote work from home, which meant the money actually stretched into something livable. Data, skincare, and sharwama when the mood struck. It wasn鈥檛 desperate money, but Jennifer was chasing something else because 鈥渘o shade, the pay was poor鈥�.

鈥淚 wanted to prove to myself that if others are making money, I don鈥檛 have two heads,鈥� she says. Jennifer鈥檚 biggest dream at the time wasn鈥檛 a flashy purchase or a travel goal. It was simpler and more urgent. She wanted to leave her parents鈥� house because she鈥檇 decided that depending on anyone, even people she loved, wasn鈥檛 something she wanted to do long-term.

At that time, a copywriter in the same online community as she was in had shared that she鈥檇 made 鈧�900k in one month. Jennifer stared at that number and felt something shift. She was already learning copywriting and had spent her entire NYSC year inside it, but seeing another woman successful in the same field suddenly made the whole thing feel real and urgent.

Jennifer had paid roughly 鈧�25,000 for a copywriting course called LMG, . What came bundled with it was a live, active community of over 500 copywriters at every stage of the journey, some still figuring out the basics, others already billing in dollars and posting receipts.

鈥淐onstantly seeing people like that motivated me more,鈥� she says, and from inside that community she found friends, a mentor and the thing that no YouTube tutorial has ever successfully replicated.

When she hit walls, and she did hit them often enough to need it, these were the people she could call. On days she wanted to stop entirely, they pushed back and encouraged her. And when opportunities came up, they thought of her name.

鈥淣o amount of grind can beat that,鈥� she says, and she means it without any performance behind it. The difference between Jennifer and the many people who join communities and extract nothing useful is that she wasn鈥檛 there only to take. She shared resources freely, helped with problems people posted publicly, and showed up without an agenda. It sounds simple because it is, but most people struggle with doing this.

鈥淚 became friends with people simply because I helped them out with one or two things, and didn鈥檛 ask for anything in return.鈥� That energy made her someone worth knowing, and knowing Jennifer, it turned out, was worth quite a lot.

How Community Became Her Most Valuable Career Asset

The User-Generated-Content (UGC) business Jennifer now runs came from a mentor, now a genuine friend, who needed video content for his e-commerce brand and trusted her enough to say, 鈥淭ry it鈥� even though she鈥檇 never done it before.

She tried it, and he loved it. Then he started talking about her to everyone in his circle, telling them what to pay her and sending them her way without her having to ask. For the entire first year of that business, she didn鈥檛 need one cold pitch. Everyone who came to her DMs did so through him, and most of them are still her retainer clients today.

Her 鈧�300,000 copywriting job came through a colleague who put her name forward for a campaign. Her single highest-paying role, at $1500 monthly, came through a friend who spotted a job post on X and forwarded it before Jennifer even knew it existed. She almost didn鈥檛 apply, convinced she鈥檇 missed the window, but sent a cold message to the CEO鈥檚 inbox anyway. Two weeks of silence followed. She sent a follow-up. The CEO didn鈥檛 reply directly, but he used her email address from her portfolio to book a meeting, and on that call, she was offered the job on the spot.

By October 2025, she had made over 鈧�4 million in a single month. 鈥淚 was just staring at my account.鈥�

The 鈧�37 million Jennifer made in 2025 went in several directions at once. MBA tuition paid monthly, her e-commerce business, a mutual funds account for investments she feeds with roughly 鈧�500k every month, stocks in MTN and GT Bank, a new apartment on the island after her former landlord situation in Lagos forced her hand. And black tax, because it鈥檚 always there, whether you plan it or not.

Jennifer invested in herself as loudly as she invested anywhere else, which tracks for someone who understands that the asset generating the returns is her.

She鈥檚 honest, though, about the one thing community costs her. 鈥淭oo many people having access to your life,鈥� she says. She鈥檚 shy by nature, and the visibility that comes with others having insider access to her still sits uncomfortably with her. The referrals and the exposure come as a package.

It鈥檚 a real tension, and it鈥檚 worth naming, because Jennifer鈥檚 story can be easily flattened into a blueprint when it鈥檚 actually something more specific than that. She built relationships by being genuinely generous to people, stayed in rooms long enough to become useful, and chased things even when the timing looked wrong. The 鈧�37 million simply followed.

鈥淚 wasn鈥檛 looking to take,鈥� she says. 鈥淚 was looking to give.鈥� That鈥檚 the whole thing, really.

HERtitude is turning 5 this April and your salary just dropped. Coincidence? Absolutely not. That’s destiny. Secure your tickets here:

At a recent conversation with 91大神, expert product managers , and spoke with on what it really takes to enter the product management industry. What came out of this discussion was an honest look at what product management actually requires, who it鈥檚 actually for and what the internet keeps getting wrong about the profession.

If you鈥檙e thinking about making the move, here鈥檚 what they had to say:

1. The Job is to Define A Product and Make It Work

The jokes about product managers are everywhere. They attend meetings. They create tickets on JIRA and they act like mini-CEOs who don鈥檛 build anything themselves. Ebube gave the clearest definition of what a product manager is there to do. They鈥檙e there to define the product and coordinate everything across the company to make it successful. The job description is value creation, value delivery, and value capture.

Karen compared it to parenting. A doctor鈥檚 job ends when the baby is safely delivered. That鈥檚 the project manager. However, the parents鈥� job is the child鈥檚 entire life. A product manager owns a product鈥檚 whole arc, not just the launch, so they collect feedback, watch growth and adjust constantly.

Florence put it more bluntly: 鈥淲e鈥檙e here to define what you鈥檙e building, why you鈥檙e building it, and then collaborate on the how.鈥� The engineering team isn鈥檛 there to take orders. The product manager is there to make sure the right questions are asked before anyone writes a single line of code.

2. You Need To Understand Engineers, Not Coding

On what鈥檚 overrated, Karen took a direct aim at the 鈥渓earn how to code鈥� crowd. She drew a line early in her career and decided she wasn鈥檛 going to be a technical product manager. That closed some doors and opened others. Her point was to know what you bring, build your career around that, and stop chasing every new tool that the algorithm throws at you.

Florence came from a technical background and hasn鈥檛 opened VS Code in years. She stressed that technical knowledge matters, but not in the way most people think. Your role exists to be the bridge between the people who build and the people who don鈥檛 understand what鈥檚 being built. That requires knowing what an API is, understanding what a database does and being able to explain both to a non-technical stakeholder without losing them. Her advice was to skip the coding course. Make friends with an engineer instead, and ask questions. The conversations you pick up informally will serve you as well as any certification.

3. If Coding Doesn鈥檛 Matter, What Skills Do?

Karen laid out three non-negotiables. The first is product discovery. This is the ability to find the right problem before you build anything. This means talking to customers, analysing data, and running research. It sounds obvious, but product managers who skip this end up building things nobody needs, with real company money.

The second is stakeholder management. Engineering wants to fix a bug, while operations wants efficiency. Your customers want something else entirely. Security flagged a breach. Everyone has a priority, and everyone thinks theirs is urgent. The product manager鈥檚 job is to hold all of that at once and make a call.

The third skill is communication. Karen was blunt about it. 鈥淚f you can鈥檛 communicate the value of your product, I don鈥檛 know what you鈥檙e doing.鈥� Storytelling is how you get buy-in, ship things and grow!

4. Product Management isn鈥檛 Unidirectional

Karen went from Chemical Engineering at UNILAG to building cross-border payment infrastructure at Visa in London. Florence co-manages ProductBuddies, a community for aspiring product managers. Ebube leads product at Rise, building tools for wealth management. Three different paths and specialisations, but the same core role.

What stood out was something Karen said almost in passing: stop following trends and start compounding skills. One year, it鈥檚 Web3. Next is no-code. Then AI. The product managers who survive those cycles are the ones who know their value and deliberately build on it.

So, Can You Actually Become a Product Manager?

Yes! The people we spoke to spent years getting wrong answers before they got the right ones. They changed industries, crossed borders, made friends with engineers and built things that didn鈥檛 work before they built things that did. That鈥檚 still the fastest path in. Figure out what problem you want to solve, and then work it out from there.

HERtitude 2026 is happening this April, and the theme is Main Character Energy. Get your tickets here:

That鈥檚 exactly what happened when clinical psychologist and multidimensional artist got talking about what it actually means to grow up as the firstborn girl. From the jump, both women said the same thing without even planning to. It starts with responsibility.

鈥淓verything kind of lies on you,鈥� Chigozie said. 鈥淵ou are the mother of the house when the mother is not around.鈥� She described being placed on a pedestal she never asked to stand on. No older sibling to look up to, no one to show her how it鈥檚 done. Just the expectation that she鈥檇 figure it out and show everyone else the way while she was at it.

Amanda spoke about 鈥渦npaid emotional labour鈥�, because beyond the running around and the problem-solving, there鈥檚 an invisible workload that first daughters carry that most people never even clock. 鈥淵ou鈥檙e the one everybody wants to talk to,鈥� she said. Your dad, your mum, your siblings, everyone routes their feelings through you, and when you finally reach out for some of that same energy back, it rarely comes in the same form. 鈥淭hey don鈥檛 really hold you the way they enjoy being held by you.鈥�

That gap, between how much you give and how little you receive, is where the loneliness lives. For Amanda, being the only girl among three brothers made it even sharper. Her mum could only see things from the perspective of her own generation. There was no one else in the house who could see Amanda at her own vantage point, as a young woman navigating a world her mother didn鈥檛 quite recognise.

So What Does The 鈥淪trong First Daughter鈥� Label Actually Do To A Person?

Amanda鈥檚 answer was layered. There are moments, she said, when the title carries real weight. When you walk into a family space and the respect is there, when your position gives you authority to move things in your direction. Being her mother鈥檚 first daughter and her grandfather鈥檚 first granddaughter came with a cultural gravitas that she鈥檚 learned to work with.

There are other moments, though, where being strong just means exhausted. Where being the emotional pillar feels less like a gift and more like a sentence. 鈥淩ight now, where I stand in my life, I don鈥檛 want to be strong for anybody but myself,鈥� she said, and she鈥檚 clear on the fact that nobody is going to hand you that boundary. You have to build it yourself, because everyone around you will keep asking you to step up until you decide to stop.

Chigozie鈥檚 version of that came after she lost her mother in 2019. She had watched her mum, also a firstborn daughter, spend her life living for other people, and made a firm decision to not repeat that pattern. Her finances and relationship dynamics changed. Her family knows now that when she draws a line, it holds. The guilt trips and manipulation, none of it holds anymore. 鈥淢e before anything else,鈥� she said and the way she said it didn鈥檛 sound selfish. She sounded like someone who fought hard for that sentence.

The healing, for Chigozie, came partly through friendships. Specifically, older women who gave her something she鈥檇 never quite had at home, which was the experience of being taken care of and being the one who got to receive. She called it healing, and it鈥檚 not hard to see why. When the entire architecture of your childhood is built around pouring out, finding a space where someone pours into you can genuinely rewire something.

Amanda took that thread in to the professional world. She runs a private mental health practice, and she鈥檚 noticed that the emotional attunement she developed as a firstborn daughter, reading moods, sensing when something鈥檚 off, managing the room, shows up directly in how she leads her team. She holds herself responsible for their wellbeing. She tracks their emotional states to help each person show up well.

She also mentioned, 鈥淚鈥檓 a therapist. I don鈥檛 know if there鈥檚 any more obvious manifestation of the first daughter who fixes everything.鈥� A woman who built a career out of helping people hold themselves together.

Both women are clear, though, that awareness doesn鈥檛 automatically mean freedom. Knowing why you do something and actually stopping yourself from doing it are two very different things. The work, as they both describe it, is ongoing. Slow, sometimes non-linear. These two women are choosing to write a different ending to the first daughter story, where they finally get to come first.

HERtitude 2026 is happening this April, and the theme is Main Character Energy. Get your tickets here:

1. 鈥淚 Asked Him While We Were Eating Suya鈥� 鈥� Mayowa*, 27

I had been seeing this man for about six weeks when I decided to have a conversation with him about getting tested before sex. I thought long and hard about it and decided not to do it over the phone. I waited until one night when we were eating suya on the road, and then I asked him like it was the most normal thing in the world (which it is).

I just said, hey, I really like where this is going, and I want us to be intentional about it. Can we both get tested before we take things further? I said it casually between bites, as if I was suggesting that we try a new restaurant. He looked at me for a second and said, 鈥淥kay, where do we go?鈥�

I believe that the suya must have helped. No one wants to be serious and confrontational when there is meat in their hand. He was relaxed, I was too, and that just worked. My advice is don鈥檛 make it a big speech or sit him down with a morbidly serious face. Make it feel like that鈥檚 the next step to take naturally, because it is. Testing together is just two adults being adults, and if you talk about it like that, most reasonable people will have no issues with that.

2. 鈥淗e Shouted At Me and Said I Had Trust Issues鈥� 鈥� Moyo*, 30

I asked my boyfriend at the time, a man that I had been with for four months, whether he could get tested before having unprotected sex. I even said please, but he wasn鈥檛 having it at all.

He said I was calling him dirty, that if I trusted him, I wouldn鈥檛 need to ask. He then swore that he had never had an infection before and couldn鈥檛 embarrass himself at the clinic because of my trust issues. I proceeded to ask him why proving it was a problem if he was so sure that he was clean.

He didn鈥檛 have a good answer, but he accused me of being difficult. Honestly, I was just being careful. We went at it for over an hour until he agreed to go, mostly to prove a point. The results came back fine, but I felt different about him.

I kept thinking鈥� if this is how he reacts to a basic conversation like this, how can we have even harder conversations down the line? He also sounded like all those 鈥榶ou鈥檙e emasculating me鈥� kind of men. He was picking his ego over my safety.

We broke up two months later because I believed that asking for the test showed me who he really was under pressure.

3. 鈥淚 Couldn鈥檛 Believe He鈥檇 Be So Straightforward About It 鈥� 鈥� Tamilore*, 25

I genuinely didn鈥檛 think it would go well, so I prepared myself for pushback, thought about different responses and a quick exit route if things went south. Turns out, I didn鈥檛 need any of that. When I told my man that I wanted us to go for tests before sleeping together, he said, 鈥淭hat makes sense. Let me know when so I can clear up my schedule in advance.鈥�

I almost didn鈥檛 know what to do. I had been so ready for a fight that his response actually stumped me for a moment. I kept waiting for some sort of disagreement, but it never came.鈥� We went together on a Saturday morning, grabbed breakfast after and turned it into a cute outing.

That day was when I realised that he was different. We鈥檝e been together for two years.

4. 鈥淚 Didn鈥檛 Ask, So He Didn鈥檛 Tell Me He Had STIs鈥� 鈥� Sekinat*, 32

I was 26, and I really believed that being in love meant trust. I took that to mean that I didn’t need to ask uncomfortable questions. The man was gentle and attentive; I didn鈥檛 want to ruin the relationship by making him feel accused of something, so I didn鈥檛 ask.

A few months later, I found out that I had contracted an STI. When I asked him about it, he told me that he had known that he needed to get checked but had been avoiding it. I鈥檓 not angry at him anymore; I鈥檓 just sorry for the younger me who felt like asking for protection was the same as not believing in the person. Those are two different things. I get tested regularly now; I ask every partner, early and clearly, to do the same.

The conversation may feel awkward for 5 minutes max, but if you don鈥檛 ask at all, the consequences are happy to follow you for way longer than that. So please, just ask before your feelings get in the way.

It鈥檚 so common to hear people talking about having chemistry with their partners, having fun and feeling connected, but there鈥檚 a version of intimacy that is more important. It鈥檚 the intimacy of telling someone that you care enough about both of you to have a conversation about STIs. It鈥檚 certainly not romantic in the way movies talk about love, but it鈥檚 real, and it matters. Ask your partner to get tested today.

HERtitude 2026 is happening this April, and the theme is Main Character Energy. Get your tickets here:

Cold pitching is when you reach out to a company or individual you want to work with, even when they haven鈥檛 put up an opening. You鈥檙e not waiting for permission, you鈥檙e walking up to the opportunity and saying, 鈥淗i, I think we should talk.鈥� It sounds bold because it is bold. Companies are always looking for great talent, even when they鈥檙e not actively hiring. A well-crafted cold pitch can get you a role that was never advertised, and a simple email can turn into a contract or at least etch your name in the mind of someone who matters.

But the way you approach it determines whether you get a reply, get ignored or even worse, get blocked quietly. So find out which type of cold pitcher you currently are.

1. The Copy-Paste Desperado

You鈥檝e decided that the key to success is volume. You have this template you wrote in 2022, that starts with 鈥淒ear Sir/Madam, I am writing to express my interest in any available position at your prestigious organisation鈥︹�� You send it to 40 companies every Monday without changing a single word, not even the company name or the role. Nothing. When you don鈥檛 hear back, you鈥檙e genuinely confused, because from where you鈥檙e standing, you put in the work.

The issue here is that hiring managers can smell a 鈥榗opy and paste鈥� email from a mile away. It tells them that you didn鈥檛 care enough to even type their company name. If you cannot take five minutes to personalise an email, why would they trust you with actual work? Send fewer emails and make each one count because one thoughtful email will always beat forty lazy ones.

2. The Overthinker Who Never Sends

You鈥檝e been drafting your pitch since the first week of January. You have seven versions saved in a Google Doc that is named 鈥淔INAL pitch v7 ACTUAL FINAL.鈥� You鈥檝e read articles, watched YouTube videos, consulted three friends, and rewritten your subject lines 20 times. The email is good at this point, but you won鈥檛 send it because what if the company thinks you鈥檙e too forward? What if the hiring manager is having a bad day?

Meanwhile, someone with a less polished pitch sent theirs on a random Tuesday and is now two rounds into interviews. Perfectionism in cold pitching is just fear cosplaying productivity. The email does not have to be flawless. SEND IT!

3. The LinkedIn Stalker

You鈥檝e done your research, and that鈥檚 actually good. The problem is that you鈥檝e taken research to mean spying. You follow the hiring manager on LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter. You like all their posts and leave comments like 鈥淪o insightful!鈥� under articles about Q2 budget planning. When you finally send the email, it starts with 鈥淚 have been following your journey for a while now, and I feel like I really know you.鈥� The hiring manager reads this and feels a very niche kind of uncomfortable.

There is a version of this character that is almost great, because research matters in cold pitching. You should know the company, but there鈥檚 a line between being informed and coming across as intense. You cross this line when your knowledge becomes personal instead of professional. You should reference their work, not their life.

4. The One Who Actually Gets It

You understand that cold pitching is about making a case so clear and convincing that a 鈥渘o鈥� would feel like a mistake. Before writing a single word, you do your homework properly. You visit the company website to understand what problems the company is solving and where they鈥檙e headed. You read recent news and look at the team page. You find the right person to contact and take note of their name and role. Then you start working on crafting an email that leads with value. Not 鈥淚 have five years of experience, and I am very passionate.鈥� Nope. You open with something that shows that you understand the company, and you have something specific to offer them.

You mention a project that the company recently launched, a gap that you noticed in the product or content, or a skill that maps directly to something the company is working on. The email is short because you respect the reader鈥檚 time. It is also specific because vague pitches never get replies. You add a request for a fifteen-minute call, instead of directly asking for a job. Then you follow-up, just once after five business days, with a short and nice message that doesn鈥檛 beg or guilt-trip them. You basically act the way a consultant would, confident and enthusiastic for the work, and because of all these, you hear back more often than not.

So, Who Are You Going To Be?

Honestly? It doesn鈥檛 really matter which of these cold pitchers you are. What matters is whether you鈥檙e willing to be the one who actually gets it. Cold pitching can open doors that the job boards may never open for you. So, do the research, write the email, send it, follow up once, and move on. Rooting for you!

Next Read: Thinking of Quitting Your 9鈥�5 to Become a Content Creator? Read This First

Before you drop your resignation letter in your boss鈥� inbox, you need to ask yourself one question: Do I want stability or freedom?

At a recent conversation featuring relationship and profit centre manager , lawyer and lifestyle influencer , and content creator , the women broke down the real difference between corporate work and creator life, and what nobody tells you about both paths.

If you鈥檙e currently stuck between a salary and social media, here are the key things to consider.

1. Decide if you can handle uncertainty, because the algorithm is not your friend

Corporate life can be stressful, but it comes with something content creation doesn鈥檛 always guarantee: predictability. In a 9鈥�5, you can at least measure your progress. You know what your KPIs are. You know when performance is being reviewed. You can negotiate for a raise. Even when your boss is difficult, there is still structure. As Nneoma put it: 鈥�You can鈥檛 negotiate with a line of code.鈥� And she鈥檚 right.

The algorithm does not care how hard you worked on your content. You can spend three hours filming, editing and writing captions, and still wake up to a post that barely reaches people. One day you鈥檙e viral, the next day your reach drops by 80%, and there is no HR, no appeal, and no explanation. If your peace depends on predictability, corporate work might frustrate you, but it won鈥檛 destabilise you.

2. Stop using 鈥渨ork-life balance鈥� as a selling point because both paths will stress you

A lot of people romanticise content creation as freedom, but the truth is, both corporate life and content creation will demand your time. Busayo asked the question many Nigerians are scared to say out loud: Is work-life balance even real for 9鈥�5 workers in Nigeria?

Realistically, how many people truly log off after work? How many people aren鈥檛 answering emails at 10 pm? How many people don鈥檛 have to reply to their boss on the weekend?

Corporate life has structure, yes, but it can also be draining, eating into your personal life. Content creation, on the other hand, gives you flexibility, but it also gives you pressure. You can鈥檛 rest too long because the internet moves fast and attention is short. If you stop posting, your visibility can drop. So the question is not whether you鈥檒l work hard. The real question is: what kind of stress do you prefer?

3. Don鈥檛 underestimate mentorship. It can save you years of mistakes

One thing that came up repeatedly is that mentorship is a cheat code in both corporate life and content creation, but it looks different in each space. Ibukun argued that the digital space gives you access that corporate work sometimes cannot. Social media can put you in rooms you didn鈥檛 apply for. It can connect you with people who would never have noticed you otherwise. She said she has had clients reach out and her honest reaction was: 鈥淗ow did you find me?鈥� The answer is simple. She kept showing up, and the internet rewarded her.

Nneoma also made a strong point that corporate mentorship can fast-track your growth because it reduces the cost of learning. She shared that she moved from biology into banking, and that learning from senior managers helped her catch up quickly. In corporate work, your mistakes might come with feedback and guidance.

In the creator space, your mistakes often come with consequences. You might have to waste money on equipment, branding, or strategy before you finally understand what works. If you鈥檙e choosing content creation, you need to be honest: can you afford to learn through trial and error?

If not, mentorship becomes even more important.

4. Know the difference between office politics and cancel culture

Every career path comes with its own version of emotional stress. In corporate work, you may deal with politics, favouritism, office gossip, and power dynamics that make work harder than it needs to be. In the creator world, you鈥檙e dealing with something else, which is public perception.

Ibukun was honest about how cancel culture comes with the job. You can post something harmless and still become the internet鈥檚 target for the day. And when dragging starts, it can be brutal. Her advice was simple: build thick skin, keep moving, and understand that unless it鈥檚 a serious scandal, people will move on.

But Nneoma disagreed. She argued that office politics is at least contained. If it becomes unbearable, you can resign. There is HR. There are labour laws. Cancel culture has none of that. The internet doesn鈥檛 just insult you, it can spread into your personal life, your family, your relationships, and even your future opportunities. It comes down to your temperament. If you are sensitive to public opinion and criticism, content creation can be emotionally exhausting. If you hate corporate power games, the creator route may feel freer.

So Which One Is Better: 9鈥�5 or Content Creation?

The honest answer is: neither is easier. They are just hard in different ways.

Corporate life gives you structure, stability, and mentorship, but can limit your freedom and slow down your financial growth. Content creation gives you visibility, flexibility, and faster earning potential, but comes with uncertainty, pressure, and emotional risk.

What matters is not what people online are doing. What matters is what you can handle.

Before you choose, ask yourself:

• Do I need stability right now, or can I handle inconsistent income?

• Can I survive months without results?

• Do I have savings or support if content creation doesn鈥檛 pay quickly?

• Do I thrive in structure or do I feel trapped by it?

• Can I handle criticism at scale?

• Do I have mentors in either space?

If you can answer those questions honestly, the decision becomes clearer. At the end of the day, the goal isn鈥檛 to pick the trendiest career path. The goal is to pick the one that matches your reality, personality, and long-term plan.

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During foreplay, when you feel like things are about to get spicy, but your body is cosplaying the Sahara Desert, or when friction is threatening to ruin the fun, that鈥檚 exactly where lubricant comes in. And no, we鈥檙e not talking about that random bottle of baby oil that鈥檚 sitting in your bathroom.

Why Lube is Actually Your Best Friend

Lube is that friend who shows up exactly when you need them, loyal and helpful to a fault. If you鈥檙e dealing with vaginal dryness, trying something new in the bedroom, or you just want to make things feel so much better, lube should be your go-to, anytime, any day.

The truth is that even when you鈥檙e fully in the mood, your body might not produce enough lubrication. This can happen for . Maybe you鈥檙e breastfeeding, going through menopause, stressed about work, or your hormones are simply showing you shege during your period.

One of the benefits of using lube is that it reduces friction during sex, which means that there are fewer in your vagina and surrounding areas. Those micro tears aren鈥檛 just painful; they could also make you more susceptible to sexually transmitted infections. If you鈥檙e using condoms (which you absolutely should be), lube makes them less likely to break or slip off.

For anal sex, lube isn鈥檛 an option; it鈥檚 mandatory. Your anus doesn鈥檛 produce any natural lubrication, so trying to have anal sex without proper lube isn鈥檛 just uncomfortable; that鈥檚 you asking for injuries. Don鈥檛 do it.

Things You Should Never Use as Lube

We get it, sometimes you鈥檙e in the mood, but you don鈥檛 have proper lube handy. Still, there are some things that are simply not meant to go anywhere near your vagina.

Saliva might seem convenient because it鈥檚 free and always available, but it鈥檚 actually terrible as lube. Your mouth harbours bacteria different from those in your vagina, and mixing the two can lead to infections. Plus, saliva dries up pretty quickly, so you鈥檙e back to square one in minutes.

Vaseline and petroleum jelly are the worst offenders. Yes, they鈥檙e slippery, but that鈥檚 basically where the good news ends. Research shows that women who use petroleum jelly inside their vagina are Petroleum jelly doesn鈥檛 wash away easily with water, so it stays in your vagina for days. That鈥檚 basically saying 鈥楬i bacteria, here鈥檚 a perfect breeding ground for you.鈥� It also completely. And good luck getting those greasy stains out of your sheets.

Baby oil, and cooking oil have the same problems as Vaseline. They can irritate your vaginal tissue, upset your pH balance, damage condoms, and are incredibly difficult to clean up. Save the coconut oil for your hair. Cooking oil should stay in the kitchen; it doesn鈥檛 belong in your vagina.

Lotion, body cream, or moisturiser might feel smooth, but they contain fragrances, preservatives, and other chemicals that will These products are designed for your external skin, not your internal organs. They also tend to dry out too quickly to be effective during sex. Body wash, soap, or shampoo are absolutely off limits. Using them can cause burning and irritation. Plus, no one wants to explain to their doctor why their vagina smells like lavender shower gel.

The Right Stuff: Types of Lubes

The good news is that proper sexual lubricants exist and are accessible, both online and in pharmacies. Here鈥檚 what you should actually be using.

Water-based lubricants are the gold standard and safest choice for most people. Popular brands available in Nigeria include (available at Supermart, OneHealth, and most pharmacies), (available at Padek Health Pharmacy and Jumia), and LUBRICA.

Water-based lubes feel most similar to your body鈥檚 natural lubrication. They鈥檙e safe to use with all types of condoms, sex toys, and barrier protection. They鈥檙e easy to clean up with just water and soap, and they鈥檙e less likely to cause irritation. The only downside is they can dry out during longer sessions, but you can just reapply or add a little water to reactivate them.

Silicone-based lubricants are thicker and last longer than water-based options, which makes them great for anal sex or marathon sessions. They鈥檙e also safe with condoms. However, it is important not to use them with silicone sex toys because they can damage the material.

When shopping for lube, check pharmacies and supermarkets, though you might need to ask the pharmacist or an attendant directly, since they鈥檙e often kept behind the counter.

What to Look For When Buying Lube

Choose a lubricant that matches your vagina鈥檚 pH (around 3.8 to 4.5) to keep your vaginal flora balanced. Avoid products with glycerine if you鈥檙e prone to yeast infections because the sugar can feed the yeast. Stay away from anything with parabens, petroleum, or string fragrances. The simpler the ingredient list, the better.

If you鈥檙e trying to conceive, look for lubricants labelled as 鈥渇ertility friendly鈥� because many regular lubes can affect sperm motility. For anal sex, look for thicker lubricants specifically marketed for anal sex, usually silicone-based or thick water-based formulas.

Stop raiding your kitchen or bathroom cabinet for makeshift solutions. Invest in a proper lubricant. These products are not luxury items; they鈥檙e basic sexual health necessities, just like condoms. Don鈥檛 let anyone or anything make you feel embarrassed about using lube. It shows you鈥檙e informed, responsible and care about having great sex.

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What Does Locking In Actually Mean?

Aramide kicked things off by keeping it brutally honest. How many people are hitting the gym as they promised on January 1st? Locking in isn鈥檛 about that week one energy when you鈥檙e convinced that this is your six-pack year. It鈥檚 about showing up consistently, even when motivation has left the group chat. She emphasised creating systems, routines, and habits that keep you accountable when the new year excitement fades.

Wamide shared insights about choosing consistency over intensity. The math is simple. Would you rather hit the gym ten times in a week, then disappear or show up twice weekly all year? She stressed the importance of alignment and execution, making sure that everything you do connects to your why, instead of just doing what鈥檚 trending on your timeline. Wamide also shared that she鈥檚 not afraid to hire support and pay for tools that make execution easier for her, because burning out isn鈥檛 the badge of honour that many people believe it to be.

Adeife came through with something that everyone needs to paste somewhere they can see it every day: The power of saying no. Locking in means keeping promises to yourself, which means declining things that don鈥檛 serve your goals. If you want to lose weight, then you need to stop accepting every food hangout invite. If you want to build your business, stop saying yes to every opportunity that looks shiny but doesn鈥檛 align with your vision.

What Habits Are We Leaving in 2025?

The speakers didn鈥檛 hold back when discussing what needs to stay relegated to 2025. Aramide reminded the girlies that not everything is suited to them. Stop overcommitting to look productive, stop joining every challenge because it鈥檚 trendy. Know your why, understand the current stage of life that you鈥檙e in, and focus accordingly. And please, stop waiting to feel ready because even the people you鈥檙e looking up to also battle imposter syndrome.

Wamide encouraged everyone to recognise that life really goes beyond just career and work. She told us about two important concepts: arming yourself with the knowledge that options exist, and paying attention to what serves you, what drains you, what environments energise you, and which people genuinely support your growth.

All three speakers emphasised that success in 2026 isn鈥檛 about doing more. It鈥檚 about doing better. Building routines that support your goals, creating accountability systems, understanding your strengths, logging off when you鈥檙e afraid, and showing up regardless. These aren鈥檛 just nice ideas. They鈥檙e the actual framework that separates people who achieve their goals from those who will still be talking about them in December.

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Nobody actually sat girls down for real talk about vaginas, vulvas, discharge, or what鈥檚 genuinely normal down there. And so, girls pick up all these wild myths, thinking something is wrong with them or their bodies are shameful.

We talked to four women about the lies they used to believe about their bodies and that light bulb moment when they finally discovered the truth.

1. 鈥淚 Spent Years Thinking Discharge Meant I Had An Infection鈥� 鈥� Tamilore*, 26

When I was a teenager, I noticed white stuff in my underwear. I thought something was seriously wrong with me, that I had contracted some disease somehow. But I was too ashamed to ask anyone about it.

I started using panty liners every single day to hide it, convinced that if anyone saw my underwear, they鈥檇 know I was dirty or sick. I鈥檇 change them multiple times a day, paranoid about the smell even though there was barely any smell at all. I wasted so much money on those liners.

When it finally occurred to me to do a Google search at 21, I almost cried with relief. I found out that vaginal discharge is normal and that鈥檚 how the vagina cleans itself. All those years of anxiety and shame because nobody bothered to tell me that my body was functioning exactly as it should.

Why wasn鈥檛 this stuff taught in biology class? We learned about photosynthesis but not about our own bodies. I鈥檇 spent almost a decade thinking I was completely abnormal when I was completely fine. Now I鈥檓 very intentional about talking to my younger cousins about these things. I tell them about discharge, about how it changes throughout your cycle, what鈥檚 normal and what actually needs a doctor鈥檚 visit.

2. 鈥淢y Auntie Told Me I鈥檇 Become Loose If I Used Tampons鈥� 鈥� Eri*, 29

I got my period at 13, and my mother only allowed me to use pads. When I asked about tampons as a teenager, my auntie overheard and pulled me aside. She told me that tampons would 鈥渙pen me up鈥� and make me loose, and that I should save my virginity for my husband. I was confused because I didn鈥檛 understand how a tampon would affect my virginity. I obviously couldn鈥檛 express my need for clarity cause she didn鈥檛 seem open to it at all.

For many more years after that, I only used pads. The discomfort when there鈥檚 heat, the fear of leaking and getting stained, and the inability to swim during my period, there were so many restrictions. All because I believed that inserting anything into my vagina would somehow damage it or take my virginity.

When I got to university and had proper sex education, I learned that the hymen is just a thin membrane that can stretch or tear from various activities, including exercise and 鈥渢ightness鈥� has nothing to do with virginity or how many tampons you鈥檝e used. When I later started using tampons and menstrual cups, my period experience changed completely, and I stopped feeling like I was wearing diapers.

3. 鈥淚 Thought All Vaginas Looked the Same Until I Was 24鈥� 鈥� Tolu*, 27

I鈥檇 never really looked at my own vagina properly until I was in my twenties. It felt wrong somehow, like something I shouldn鈥檛 do. But one day, out of curiosity, I used a mirror, and I was horrified. It felt like my greatest fear had finally come true. My inner labia were longer than my outer labia. They were much darker, too. I immediately thought something was wrong with me.

I started researching 鈥渁bnormal vagina鈥� and went down a rabbit hole of cosmetic surgery websites talking about labiaplasty. I was sure that I needed surgery to correct my 鈥渄eformed鈥� vagina. I even started saving money for it.

Then I stumbled on an educational website that showed different types of vulvas, and I realised there鈥檚 no such thing as a 鈥渘ormal鈥� looking vagina. Some people have longer inner labia, some have asymmetrical labia, some are darker, some are lighter. The variation is endless, and all of it is normal.

I felt like someone had sold a lie to me my entire life. Watching pornography and the complete lack of real education had made me think all vaginas were supposed to look a certain way. Neat, tucked in and light pink. That鈥檚 not the reality because that鈥檚 not how most bodies actually look.

4. 鈥淪omeone Told Me Vaginas Get Loose From Too Much Sex鈥� 鈥� Nike*, 31

This is probably the most pervasive lie about vaginas. I grew up hearing it everywhere, from friends, movies, and jokes that men made. The idea is that if you have too much sex or change partners a lot, your vagina becomes loose like an old rubber band.

I believed it so deeply that even in my twenties, I was anxious about having sex regularly with my partner. I thought that if we had too much sex, I鈥檇 become loose and he鈥檇 lose interest in me. Sometimes, I鈥檇 turn him down, not because I wasn鈥檛 interested, but because I thought my vagina was supposed to be tight.

When I finally learned that the vagina is a muscle that returns to its normal state after sex, I was shook. Apparently, it鈥檚 designed to stretch during arousal and sex, and then go back. That鈥檚 how muscles work. You can鈥檛 wear out your vagina any more than you can wear out your mouth from talking too much.

The amount of anxiety this has caused me is ridiculous. I鈥檇 wasted years worrying about something that isn鈥檛 even physiologically possible. The insane part is how this lie is weaponised against women. It鈥檚 used to shame us for having sex, to make us feel like our bodies are depreciated. Nobody tells men their penis gets smaller from too much sex.

These stories are rooted in shame. Shame planted by silence, watered by misinformation, and harvested as anxiety about our own bodies. We鈥檙e taught that our natural bodily functions are issues to be fixed or hidden away from the world. What we鈥檙e learning, instead, is that our bodies are not broken, and we deserve better than lies disguised as wisdom. We need to always remember to talk openly about these topics so that the next generation doesn鈥檛 inherit the same shame that these women did.

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