Imagine him chasing a criminal聽and running into traffic on Third Mainland Bridge.

Police will arrest him too many times

A young man driving a sports car that no one has ever seen? Wearing all black? WITH A MASK? The police will be over the moon.

Too many copycats

Nigerians love copying things that work or look cool. Just look at how many cook-a-thons have happened in the past few months because of Hilda Baci. There鈥檇 probably be a Batman in every local government.

He might switch careers to become a sugar daddy

If he can鈥檛 help people by delivering criminals to the police who might free them later, he might as well just spend his money on Lagos baddies. The ultimate glucose guardian.

Agberos will probably beat him up

What鈥檚 going to happen when Batman is forced to face agberos in Mushin? Even the Batmobile and Alfred wouldn鈥檛 be able to save him.

He鈥檒l have japa plans too

Nigerians will frustrate him so much, he鈥檒l start making plans to continue his vigilante career in another country. 

But the Nigerian Customs will stress him

We all know what鈥檚 going to happen when he shows up at the passport office in his costume. Billing HQ.

NEXT READ: Nigerians Reimagined Superheroes As Boarders, And It鈥檚 Hilarious

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever is out, and I can鈥檛 keep calm about it. One of the most anticipated films of 2022, this sequel manages to be action-packed and grounded in emotion at the same time. Between the drama and fight scenes, here are some moments you might鈥檝e missed watching Black Panther: Wakanda Forever. 

Shuri and Killmonger have similar Black Panther suits 

Shuri and Killmonger have a lot in common, being two people who became Black Panthers out of a desire to avenge the deaths of their loved ones. A cool move the film made to point to this similarity is seen in the design of Shuri鈥檚 suit. Just like Killmonger鈥檚, hers has gold details, while her brother, T鈥機halla鈥檚 suit had silver details. 

The film鈥檚 reference to Chadwick鈥檚 actual death 

Chadwick Boseman鈥檚 death in 2020 was a massive surprise to his fans and most of the Black Panther cast. The actor allegedly hid his colon cancer diagnosis from everyone on set and worked through the pain. Referencing this silence in a scene between Shuri and Namor, Shuri mentions her brother 鈥渟uffered in silence鈥� and didn鈥檛 reach out to her for help until it was too late. 

Ironheart and Iron Man have more in common than you think 

Yes, Riri Williams is set to replace the massive iron-sized hole in our hearts after Tony Stark, a.k.a Iron Man, died in Avengers: Endgame. But did you also notice she鈥檚 a Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) student, just like Stark was, as revealed in Captain America: Civil War? Fun educational fact. 

Chadwick Boseman鈥檚 real birthday makes an appearance 

In a blink-and-you-鈥檒l-miss-it moment, Wakanda Forever references Chadwick Boseman鈥檚 birthday towards the end of the film, when Okoye rescues Agent Ross. If you look closely at the plate number of the car he鈥檚 locked in, you鈥檒l see the plate number 鈥淐B112976鈥�, a direct reference to Chadwick鈥檚 birthday 鈥� November 19, 1976. 

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Guess the comedian who voices Shuri鈥檚 AI, Griot? 

If your money was on The Daily Show Host, Trevor Noah, you鈥檙e absolutely correct. 

Namor might signal the arrival of the X-Men 

While sharing the backstory of how he became the Serpent King, Namor refers to himself as a mutant, a term that isn鈥檛 common in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. But with X-Men moving into the MCU space just like Spiderman did, Namor鈥檚 statement might imply that Marvel Studios is ready to fully explore their mutant characters moving forward. 

Is M鈥橞aku a vegetarian for real? 

One funny scene from the first Black Panther was when M鈥橞aku threatened to feed Agent Ross to his children before revealing he was joking because his family are vegetarians. In Wakanda Forever, we see M鈥橞aku eating carrots at least twice during the film, which might hint he鈥檚 actually vegetarian. 

References to the upcoming Antman film 

While it was cool to have actual CNN anchorman Anderson Cooper break most of the fictional news on TV in Wakanda Forever, his presence might鈥欌�檝e distracted you from reading the headlines on the screen. In one scene, while announcing Queen Ramonda鈥檚 death, we can see a headline that references Scott Lang, AKA Antman, stating that the superhero is now a celebrity based on his memoir. This seems random, but since the next Marvel film is Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantomania, I doubt it鈥檚 a coincidence. 

Shuri remembers M鈥橞aku鈥檚 diss 

Shuri never forgets. In a tender scene between the new Black Panther and M鈥橞aku after her mother鈥檚 burial, Shuri reminds the towering M鈥橞aku of the time he referred to her as a 鈥渃hild who scoffs at tradition鈥�. However, things are good between them, as M鈥橞aku advises Shuri against succumbing to her grief and thirst for revenge. 

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When Marvel‘s Black Panther premiered in February 2018, it was more than just a superhero movie; it was a cultural movement. In a time when audiences were getting tired of the Marvel formula of replacing creative risks with unnecessary jokes (and let’s not forget the lineup of superheroes that looked like the cast of Friends), Black Panther was visually vibrant, epic and far removed from the overly manufactured stories we’d come to know Marvel for. 

Making over $1 billion worldwide, and almost 鈧�1 billion in Nigeria, Black Panther was a massive success. And just like everyone else, I was excited about a sequel. Then the film’s lead actor, Chadwick Boseman, passed away in 2020, leaving a massive void in the Black Panther world, and honestly, in the real world as well. 

Arriving as one of the year’s most anticipated films, Black Panther: Wakanda Forever had huge shoes to fill. It had to deal with the passing of its lead character on screen, follow the Marvel formula of being bigger than its predecessor in every way possible, meet the expectation of Black people, who have placed the first one on a pedestal, and still lay the groundwork for at least two or three upcoming Marvel films/TV shows. 

That’s too much for one film. 

In Black Panther: Wakanda Forever, we meet the women T’challa, aka Black Panther, left behind. His sister, Shuri (Letitia Wright) is dealing with her inability to save her brother despite being one of the brightest minds in the Marvel universe. Okoye (Danai Gurirra), the ever-loyal Dora Milaje leader (who M’baku calls a “bald demon” in one hilarious scene), is focused on physically protecting her country. While Queen Ramonda (Angela Bassett), T’Challa’s mother, is forced to quickly deal with her grief, assume the throne and protect Wakanda from colonisers trying to steal vibranium. 

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever also introduces Namor (Tenoch Huerta), the king of Talokan, an underwater city rich in, wait for it, vibranium. After the US develops a vibranium-detecting machine that brings them close to his people, Talokan gets pissed and kills them. But that’s not enough for this demi-god who can swim and fly. He also makes his way to Wakanda and demands that Queen Ramonda bring the scientist who made this vibranium machine to him. If not, he’d be more than happy to deal with Wakanda and its people. 

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Namor’s introduction into the story is great, but it also sends it down a path that’s all too familiar for Marvel fans. While the first Black Panther was contained and dealt with the story of it’s main characters without the interference of the outside Marvel world, the mission to find this scientist pushes the story into the regular “we must introduce a character from our upcoming film/ TV show鈥�  pattern. In comes Riri Williams (Dominique Thorne), aka Ironheart (from the upcoming Ironheart TV show, duh). 

Don’t get me wrong, I love all the Riris in Wakanda’s world, including Rihanna, but Riri Williams is introduced as the new teenage comic relief now that Shuri is too busy dealing with grief to be funny. We also spend too much time with CIA agent, Everett Ross (Martin Freeman), and his ex-wife/CIA boss, Valentina (Julia Louis-Dreyfus). Their dispute is cute but does nothing to push the story along. Also, the fewer colonisers I see on my screen, the better. The unnecessary funny scenes with these characters take away from time that could’ve been spent focusing on building Namor’s world a bit more. 

We’re introduced to the Talokan city after Shuri offers herself as a living sacrifice to Namor (a guy who looks like that, I’d be a sacrifice too, for sure), but it feels brief. Outside of Namor, the other Talokans don’t feel fully developed beyond being just an army. 

Another underutilised character is Aneka (Michaela Coel), who plays one of the Dora Milaje turned Midnight Angels. In interviews leading up to the film’s release, Michaela spoke about accepting the role because it helped portray a queer couple in the Marvel Universe. Outside of (which I’m sure the average audience doesn’t know about), nothing hints at Aneka and Ayo, another Dora Milaje soldier, being in a relationship. Aneka gives Ayo a peck on the head in the closing scene, but it’s a “blink, and you’ll miss it” moment. I get the 鈥渟how, don’t tell鈥� filmmaking technique, but nothing was shown here. 

Compared to Black Panther, this sequel also falls short in its action sequences. While the bridge car chase scene and Okoye’s fight with the Talokans in Boston are major highs, the final fight scene feels crowded and rushed. An oversaturated fight scene is nothing new in Marvel (people of God, Endgame), but it鈥檚 almost uncoordinated here. None of the sequences blew my mind or sent a shockwave of adrenaline into my body. 

That being said, my biggest gripe with Black Panther: Wakanda Forever is its failure to submit to the grief side of the story it was trying to tell. After Namor attacks Wakanda and kills Queen Ramonda in the film’s second act, Shuri is ultimately left with no one. She recreates the purple heart-shaped herb and drinks its nectar to become the new Black Panther and avenge her mother. Then she goes into the spirit world where she meets none other than Eric 鈥淜illmonger鈥� (Michael B. Jordan), her cousin, and the villain from the first film. 

Shuri being greeted in the spirit realm by Killmonger, instead of her father or mother, signals her full descent into revenge mode, the same emotion that fuelled Killmonger鈥檚 actions. Another scene that solidifies this is her decision to go with the gold-lined Black Panther suit similar to Killmonger鈥檚, as opposed to the silver-lined T鈥檆halla-inspired suit. Despite all of this, the script refuses to let Shuri go all the way.  

For someone hellbent on avenging her mother’s death, doing a full 180 degrees and dropping her spear just because she saw her mother’s ghost feels insincere. She should鈥檝e taken more time to contemplate which part she’d take 鈥� murderer or peacemaker 鈥� especially after all the lives she risked (and lost) to get there. 

Rushing Shuri’s grieving process to wrap the film up in a lovely peaceful bow doesn’t sit right with my spirit. 

Minor hiccups aside, Black Panther: Wakanda Forever is a brilliant film that does its best to honour the legacy of the man whose back it was built on, appease the fans and still make sure the Marvel monster machine is well fed. Major props to Angela Basset for commanding every scene she was in, Danai Gurirra for the action sequences and comedic timing, Lupita Nyong’O and Winston Duke for eating up their roles, and finally, Letitia Wright for being the new back that carries the film. 

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever isn’t perfect, but then again, can any film about grief be? I don’t think so. 

ALSO READ: 鈥淏lack Panther鈥� Premiere Looks From 鈥淰ibranium Strong鈥� to 鈥淲akanda Fashion is This?鈥�

Let me introduce you to the real superheroes: 

Sango

We all know how the last ! Some people hated that Thor had moved from powerful god to a comedian at Night of a Thousand Laughs, while others welcomed the less serious direction the franchise took. My solution? Marvel needs to kill the Thor idea completely and make a film about Sango. 

Just like Thor, Sango is also a god of thunder and lightning. He was a Yoruba king who ascended to god status after seeking powers to destroy his enemies. While there’s already a 1997 Sango film, I’m down to see a new take on this iconic figure. 

Ogun 

Ogun is the very popular god of iron and war. He is known for his creativity, destructive nature and quick temper, which often gets him misunderstood. Am I the only one who sees a lot of similarities between Ogun and a famous fictional billionaire tech guru who also had a thing for iron? 

An action thriller that details Ogun’s role as the reclusive and brooding god who invents a lot of cool stuff would slap harder than firewood Jollof. 

Agwu Nsi 

Agwu Nsi is the god of divination, poets, healing and 鈥� wait for it 鈥� divine madness. Considering we’re currently exploring the Multiverse of Madness, Agwu Nsi fits into . Imagine a superhero based on this god that can make people mad at will or, better still, turn his enemies into romantic poets. Sign me up! 

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Oya 

Oya is the goddess who controls the weather. She can control lightning, tornadoes, storms, and even earthquakes with her powers. Another power she has outside of her weather abilities is the ability to talk to the dead, or make them come alive if she feels they have unfinished business on earth. 

Who is Storm from X-Men again? I don’t know her because Oya is definitely eating up the other girlies up in the weather department. 

Amadioha 

You can’t be Nigerian and claim not to have heard Amadioha’s name; honestly, it’s Nollywood‘s fault. Just like Sango, Amadioha is the Igbo god of thunder and lightning. He is also the god of justice, and that’s why people tend to say, “May Amadioha strike whoever did this shit dead.”

Fun fact, while most gods have powerful symbols and weapons like Sango, who uses an axe, Amadioha’s symbol is a white ram. Yes, a white ram. So the next time you see a white ram, think twice before doing something bad. 

Aja 

Aja is first and foremost the goddess of healing who resides deep in the forest 鈥� not sure which forest, to be honest. Outside of being able to heal people at the snap of her fingers, Aja has this cool power of being able to shapeshift into any animal she chooses. Imagine fighting a superhero like that? One minute you’re fighting what looks like a woman, and the next thing, you’re wrestling an elephant. Omo! 

Nigerian witches 

Not sure how effective this bunch are, considering that Nigeria is sinking and they haven’t made a move to save it. But from those who Nigerian covens have afflicted at some point, the pain they inflict do usually result in hot tears. 

If we can watch Harry Potter and his gang go back to Hogwarts year after year, despite the fact that Voldemort always manages to attack them, then why can’t we have a badass film about Nigerian witches kicking ass and causing chaos? 

ALSO READ: 10 of the Baddest Witches From Classic Nollywood

This had me wondering what Doctor Strange’s adventures would look like in Nigeria. Here鈥檚 what I came up with. 

1. Doctor Strange would’ve been a Yoruba man聽

Because only a Yoruba demon would think it makes sense to attend his ex’s wedding when he still likes her. He’s also technically the reason that the monster appeared 鈥� if the other universe’s Doctor Strange didn’t try to take America’s powers, she wouldn’t have freaked out and opened the portal by mistake. So he also ruined her wedding. Doctor Adekunle Strange, we see you and your gold chain. 

2. Doctor Strange would’ve taken America to MFM the minute he realised The Scarlet Witch was after her

As Nigerians, we don’t mind doing a little ritualism or jazz, but when it’s about to backfire, we find our way back to the Holy Father. A real Nigerian man would’ve taken America to the nearest Mountain of Fire Ministries (MFM) the minute he found out Wanda was after her. Nothing like a good binding and casting session to remove bad luck from someone鈥檚 body.

3. Wong and the other sorcerers would’ve handed America over to Wanda the minute she showed up in her red jumpsuit聽

Imagine losing your friends and home for some random girl you just met yesterday, all because she says her name is America and she has some immigration powers she can’t even control. God forbid! Aunty Wanda, please take her. They would’ve literally tied her up and shipped her on a night bus to Wanda. 

4. Buhari would’ve told Lai Mohammed to ban magic聽

Bubu doesn’t waste time with things like this. He might not sign an important bill on time, but he will definitely ban anything that stresses him. The minute witches and wizards start flying up and down without shame, Lai Mohammed will make an announcement on NTA sharp sharp. It won鈥檛 make a difference but when was the last time any policy from this government made a (positive) difference?

5. Wanda would鈥檝e tried other means to get her children back聽

Mama Ibeji was really doing the most for her Powerpuff children she created using magic. Why didn’t she just remake them? It can’t be that hard. If the Wanda鈥檚 in other universes got it right, that means she could too. 

6. Wong would’ve poisoned Dr Strange a long time ago

We love Dr Strange, but he鈥檚 always rude to Wong and constantly stresses that poor man out by doing things he鈥檚 not supposed to. Imagine how easy Wong’s life would be if Dr Strange gets taken out of the picture. There’s also the fact that Wong is superior in ranking, but Dr Strange keeps insulting him like he’s doing NYSC with the sanctum. Wong, it’s time to tap into your inner Chiwetalu Agu and make your life easier. No one will judge you. 

7. Doctor Strange would’ve asked the Illuminati for a music career

Imagine meeting the same Illuminati that blew up Jay Z, Beyonc茅, and Rihanna鈥檚 careers and not asking for them to do your own. American Doctor Strange might be white and slow, but the Nigerian version is a soji guy that knows that opportunity only comes but once. Wanda can carry Australia or whatever her name is. The time has come to win Grammys! 

8. Wanda would’ve exited the temple before destroying it聽

So you want to tell me that the woman that turned Mr Fantastic into Golden Penny spaghetti can鈥檛 destroy a temple without leaving first? Marvel, y鈥檃ll are detty liars. If Wanda was Nigerian, she would’ve gone a safe distance before blowing up that temple. Self preservation is important to us. Our existence might be hell lite but we love staying alive.

As much as we LOVED it, the first 10 minutes set in Lagos, did have us like:

Team 91大神, every time someone in the movie pronounced it as Lah-gos.

Lagos, watching the movie like:

Oya, let’s think of some of the ways Lah-gos, Nigeria is completely different from Lagos, Nigeria.

When they started off with Black Widow and Scarlet Witch drinking coffee under Lah-gos sun.

Lagos sun and hell fire that are like:

They now showed us two Lah-gos policemen and neither of them had a potbelly.

Edakun, where was this oga in all this?

Then we saw Falcon looking down at a Lah-gos street in the middle of the day

…and the roads were actually free.

There was actually light in Lah-gos in the afternoon.

PHCN and Lagos that are like:

Fast forward to Black Widow in the middle of a Lah-gos market

…and nobody did this:

Even when Falcon finally came down to join her

…not one Igbo brother shouted “heysss fine boy!” at him.

Then see Lah-gosians that were just standing around watching people with guns and bombs fight.

Real Lagosians, when they hear anything that just sounds like a gunshot:

Captain America, calling for the Lah-gos fire and rescue department after a bombing:

The real Lagos fire department when you call them:

Anyway, all na jokes. Lagos is awesome and so is the movie. Oya, go see it if you haven’t.