Everyone knows Bread is a bad bitch. She can be a bad bitch either alone or with company, so it鈥檚 no surprise when everyone tries to be Bread鈥檚 lover. She鈥檚 seen jam, beans, butter and even pap compete to be her primary companion.
Today, Bread invited all her admirers to debate on why she should spend the rest of her life with one of them.
Jam
Bread, you are sweet, but with me, you鈥檙e sweeter. I know I was created with you in mind, my sweetness was made for yours and my creator made me because you exist. I can鈥檛 imagine a life without you and I don鈥檛 want to spend the rest of mine without the food that works best with me. Ignore what the rest of them say because when you鈥檙e with me, you鈥檙e your best self.
Butter
I know I鈥檓 multifaceted, but I spread better when I鈥檓 with you. We work together, I in you and you in me. Issues may arise from me seeing other foods, but you鈥檙e the one I want to continue spreading on for the rest of my life. Yours, butter.
Beans
Butter said it鈥檚 multifaceted, but I鈥檓 the Beyonce of meals. I have been with you in different forms and I have weathered many storms with you. I鈥檝e been with you as cooked beans, as ewa agoyin, as moin-moin, as akara and as ekuru. The list goes on and on. You too, see how many good and tasty things we鈥檝e achieved together. I鈥檓 with you and for you and I look forward to being yours for as long as I live.
Fried Egg
I am risking my relationship with Yam to be here today. Bread, if you don鈥檛 accept me, I鈥檒l have nowhere to run to. You know we shouldn’t be doing this
Mayonnaise
To be very honest, I don鈥檛 know what I am doing here. I heard people shouting Bread and I decided to follow them. All I know is that people keep trying to force a relationship on us and I have been encouraging them. Even I know that we don鈥檛 go well together. I am a and that鈥檚 what I鈥檓 about to do here.
Stew
I鈥檝e been by your side before the rest of them existed and I have to admit that I鈥檓 a little heartbroken that you鈥檙e letting the others get to your head. Contrary to what you think, I am not your bro, I know my siblings and they know me. I want to be your lover, Dip yourself into me and experience hot, spicy, unspeakable joy.
Peanut Butter
I saw jam coming here and decided to join them. All I want is for Bread, jam and I to be a throuple and I鈥檒l be ok.
Indomie
I think I鈥檓 lost. Where is the way out of here?
*Oats and avocado are still at the door knocking, but Bread has heard enough*
